Woven Desires [Completed]

Repressed Feelings

"I missed you."

"Really?" She releases me to sit next to me with her legs on my laps. 

I nod, not finding any words to add, because nothing can express what I'm feeling right now. Having her near me again gives me the impression that I can overcome anything. I was wrong when I told myself Quincey was the only one I needed. He is important to me, but I need Tiffany in my life as well. 

"Titi...," I take a good look at her face, I can't believe she's here. I've looked into her grey eyes more than a million times before yet I have the impression that I'm rediscovering them. I have a new found love for them, they make me think of a beautiful night sky. "Don't ever do this again," I say pulling her back into another hug, well aware of how lucky I am to have her in my life. 

We stay that way for a while without saying anything, but after the cramps in our arms and legs make us let go of each other, Sam enters the living room to inform us that diner is ready. 

We follow him to the kitchen and he apologizes to me again as he places the meal in front of me. He knows me well. Now, I'm a bit more ready to listen to his excuses.

"It's not his fault," Tiffany intervenes, and gestures for Sam to give us a moment. "I begged him and mum not to say anything," she continues once he's gone. "They were so scared I would disappear again, they agreed to not tell anyone I was back."

"I don't get it," I say after shoving a delicious piece of Sam's succulent chicken in my mouth. "Why force them to keep it a secret? When did you come back?"

"Four weeks ago."

"Huh?!" I almost choke on the sip of water I just took. "Four weeks? Titi!"

"Sorry! Sorry... I thought you were still angry with me."

"So what? You alienated yourself from everyone?"

"Pretty much. I left home for a few days, but I missed mum too much. I decided to come back, but I still couldn't face you knowing what I did to you, knowing how much I hurt you. So, I decided to lay low, at least until you reached out to me. When you called earlier, I thought you butt dialed me. But you called again and again so I thought maybe-" 

"Stop stop stop," I put down my fork and knife, then take in a deep breath. "You and I have a lot to talk about."

"Talk about as in? You're not angry anymore right?"

"Angry?"

"Isn't that why you called? Please let us put this behind us Shasha. I've decided not to see Orson ever again, so that's settled."

"What? Are you serious?" 

"Yes."

"There's no need to-"

"No. I've made up my mind," her voice is firm and her eyes don't look away from me. "You are more important to me than some guy I met recently."

"How can you say that?"

She doesn't answer and focuses on her food again. While I'm happy to know how much I mean to her, I can't help but feel bad for Orson. What if he's not as important to her as I thought he was? He cares for her so much, doesn't she care for him just as much? Maybe their time together didn't mean that much to her.

"Miss," Sam calls and we both turn to him. "I'm going to take my leave. Your mother should be back from work in a couple of hours. Have a nice evening."

We greet him and after he leaves, we both eat in silence for a few minutes, before I decide to bring up the topic of her boyfriend again. 

"Titi, you know Orson likes you a lot."