- ELEVEN -
Seven months of amazing friendship with Mike. If I said he didn't change my life I'd be lying. Mike is my best friend in the whole world!
And now that I'm part of the party, it's like a big family. I love them all so much. They all love me too and accept me for who I am.
Two months ago I told them about the lab. Mike convinced me that they'd accept me and I believed him. I'm so happy he was right. He's always right.
Mike is so smart and kind, he cares so much about everyone. Who knew that Mike Wheeler would end up being this amazing?!
Snap back to reality. Today is a dark and rainy day but Mike and I don't care. In fact, we prefer these days. We met on one of these days.
I walked into the park and saw him standing by the swings, listening to music through his headphones.
He saw me and immediately smiled and walked over to me.
" El..." He smiled at me and I smiled back.
" Mike.." I said and hugged him tightly.
He picked me up and spun me around, it was like a scene from a movie. The rain flew off us as we spun. I laughed and he put me down.
" I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr " He dragged on.
" We saw each other yesterday. " I responded.
" Exactly. " He said and grabbed my hand and started walking to the swings.
The sleeve of his hoodie lifted up and I saw cuts on his arm. " Mike. " I said quietly and looked at him, he stopped walking and looked at me.
" What? "
" W-What are those cuts on your arm? " You could hear the nerves in my voice, I was so worried that someone had hurt him.
I'd kill them. Anyways...
" Oh..." He let out and pulled his hand away from mine. I felt cold without his touch and realized how tense he looked.
" Don't worry about it El..." He said, I could hear the sad tone of his voice.
" Mike..tell me, please. " I said, he looked down. I stepped closer to him so he was looking down at me.
" It's okay, you know you can tell me anything..." I said quietly.
Mike sighed, " El, I made those cuts. "
" W-What? " I stepped back and his gaze followed.
" Nobody hurt me, I hurt myself. " Mike said.
I didn't understand.
" Why? " I sounded upset now. I was. I don't want Mike to be hurt. Why would he do that?
" I-I don't want to talk about it..." He said, a tear rolled down his cheek, mixing in with the rain.
" Please Mike...I need an explanation.. " I cried out. I felt as though my heart had just been stabbed. My lungs being gripped tightly by two strong fists.
" El...I have depression...it makes me feel alone...worthless....terrible...I can have the best day ever yet at the end of it I feel so unexplainably sad and numb at the same time. It's unbearable....I-I cut myself...to try and...and have control..." He explained and avoided any eye contact.
" I'm sorry " he said and paused.
" I'm so fucking weak..." He cried.
I looked up at him. " No Mike. You are not weak. " I grabbed his hands and held them.
He looked down, I watched as tears flowed freely down his cheeks and raindrops fell down his messy curls.
" My dad was right..." He said quietly.
Right? Right about what?
" Mike, what are you talking about? " I asked softly.
" He says I'm a waste of life, I should've never been born. He's right. " Mike said, he sounded so defeated.
No. Nobody should ever feel like that, especially not him.
" No. " I say, his eyes finally meet mine.
" Mike, you are the strongest person I know. And you matter. So much. " I say, tears pricking the corners of my eyes.
" Do you promise? " He asks.
I squeeze his hands " I promise. " I say and look into his eyes.
I can't hold back anymore, I stand up on my tippy toes and kiss him firmly. I loosen my hands from his, I place one gently on his jaw, the other in his hair.
He leans down so I'm in a more comfortable position and puts his hands on my waist.
Rain keeps falling, tears keep falling. That all melts away though as all we focus on is our connected lips. I can feel warmth spread across my face and burn in my stomach.
I go to pull away but he pulls me closer and connects our lips again.
I don't want to be just best friends..
Hey everyone. I just wanna say, I know I update slow and I'm really sorry. Today has been especially hard for me, people always just walk all over me, I'm so sick of it. I want to scream or cry or do both. Idk anymore. I hope you guys like this chapter, I love you all ❤️