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year 2018.

 dear lee hyunjae,

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dear lee hyunjae,

i don't wanna fall in love anymore.

seeing what you did really broke my heart. i can't believe you actually did that with another woman.

honestly..?

i'm broken right now, hyunjae. what you did really broke me completely.

then you had the guts to run over my side and tell me what i saw was all just a big misunderstanding.

tch. yeah.

i'm so fucking heartbroken. i really didn't think you'd do that sort of thing. why? was i just a play thing this whole time? did you not need me?

after that, i just stormed off and blocked you everywhere. i even told jaemin not to open up the door if he sees you through the peephole. fucking disgusting little shit.

i'm sending you all these letters tomorrow. you won't read them, i'm sure, probably busy fucking that woman to read my letters anymore like how we used to read each other's letters last year. but guess what? i don't care. i'm gonna send them to you anyway. not like i want any pieces of memory that include YOU in my house.

so until then, i wanna say farewell. i now feel like shit because of you, and i probably won't stop for a long time. i'm 21 now and so are you. we've known each other for 10 years. starting out from when i was young and hated you, till now. and wow, that never changed.

i guess you were born to be a liar.

i don't know, maybe i'm... being too harsh? i just hate how you lied to me this whole time.. were all the things you told me when we were friends lies too?

goodbye, lee hyunjae.

thanks for wasting 10 years of my life.

a heart of darkness,
na chaehee 🖤

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