Crystal ball

Time is the greatest healer

A year from now
I will have recovered
I'll be able to go out in public
Without fear.
I will be able to speak without second guessing
To say what needs to be said in difficult times
Instead of my voice shaking.
Time is the greatest healer,
I wish I had a crystal ball,
Just to see myself smile again.

Does the pain I'm feeling now make you stronger? I'll ask myself.
Do the anti depressants help?
Do the hours of therapy pay off?

I smile back, stronger, healthier, happier and whisper
Yes. You will be okay,
Don't give up, don't slip away.
You can't lose your sanity
You can't lose your good heart.
You will find yourself again .
She leaves

I feel better. But for how long ?
The pain in my heart is real.
The panic attacks will return.
When will I be the girl in the crystal ball?