Surviving Cancer

Homecoming

"Kind of? Like you take care of me?"

"Yeah".

" Then what happened? "

"She got too sick"

"Too sick? Is there even such a thing?"

"Yes Abele, and I hope you're never too sick"

"I think I have it in my genes"

"Have what?"

"The cancer. A lot of my family has passed away early aged from it. My dad's--"

"He's what?". The first word that comes to mind is dying, but I just couldn't say it aloud. Not even in my head could I say it.

" Too sick "

"Oh...I'm sorry"

"It's not your fault"

"I almost wish it was"

"What?! Why?!"

"To take some of the anger and pressure off of you"

"How would you being responsible for my dad's death help me in any way?"

"Because then you'd know, you'd have a reason why. When people die from cancer, there is no reason why. There's no one to blame, that's why people blame themselves, or God. We all point fingers as to the reason of our loss and damage the relationships around us because we don't want to get too close to people and have to lose them too. If I were the reason why, you'd hate me and could say it's because of Tylar my dad's dead. But you can't, because it's not because of me, or you, or God, or anyone else. It's because of cancer,and cancer can not feel the pain of hatred"

"Wow.."

"What?"

"I've just never thought of if in that way, so twisted"

"Oh"

"So what happened after Cat got too sick?"

" I stopped hanging out around her. I avoided her as much as possible "

"But why?"

"It's hard enough to see people suffering on television news stories, nevertheless forming relationships with the people, and watching them wither away into nothing right in front of you". Now that I understood.

" So she's always been sick?"

"I don't think she had a day in her life where she was healthy"

"It's so sad"

"What is?"

"The cancer, Cat, this place, the doctors,the nurses, the death"

"Since when did you start thinking so negative?"

"The second I found out I had a dying father with cancer on the side, an IV that hurts like a butt in my hand, bankruptcy, an insane mother, and a dead girl holding my hand"

"Oh"

"But I also have a pretty great roommate"

"Don't count on me too much Abele"

"Why not?"

"Because I already count on you, if you count on me it makes me counting on you less special. And as a plus, I don't think I've got much longer anyway either"

"Don't say that!"

"But it's true Abele. Pass cancer once, and you're okay, pass it twice and your good, pass it three times and you're golden"