The Struggle For Love ✔

Chapter 18 - Unbalanced memories

Stan soothingly rubs my back with his hand, and I noticed he is rocking me back and forth gently.

"Can't they give you something that'll help you sleep better?"

"They did already but so far it isn't helping."

"And how's your head? Does it hurt?"

"I'm really unfocused, and dizzy easily." I yawn tiredly, allowing myself to relax into his hold a bit more. "I just want to go home though. Sleep in your arms again."

Finnley snorts, though it sounds a bit... sarcastic? Before he gets up, leaving his book behind on the table and exiting the room without another word.

"What's going on with him, Stan? I'm worried to no end."

"Don't worry about Finn right now. You need to focus on you and nobody else."

"Can you please answer one question?"

Stan bites his lips, staring at me as I pulled my head back to look him in the eyes. "Depends..."

"Was I driving myself and did I cause the accident?"

"Those are two questions, but no to both." He smiles carefully and answers my kiss with one of his own. "You're not to blame."

"So, who was driving? Was it Finn?"

Stan smirks, before he shakes his head. "It wasn't Finn. I'm not sure... If I could tell."

"Because I don't remember, right?" I sigh annoyed, shaking his arms off e to lay back down annoyed. "I just want to know how they're doing."

"The guy's doing... okay. Seeing the circumstances, he's okay. Compared to you, he's fine."

"Did he whoever drove cause the accident?"

"He did not. Cris, please... stop asking all these questions that I'm not supposed to answer. You know I can't stand those puppy-eyes from you."

"I know." I smirk and laugh out a bit. "I'll stop asking questions about the accident."

"Ha, you're not fooling me. Not just the accident, but anything."

"Finn too?"

"Finn's a forbidden subject too, yes."

"But whatever happened, it's killing him. I can tell. He's not doing good at all. I mean, he's here every day, but we hardly speak to each other and he keeps avoiding eye contact, he keeps avoiding every subject I start. For crying out loud, Stan,we talked about thewhethertoday."

"Stop worrying about..."

"I'm not going to stop worrying!" I cut him short, sending him an angry look. "It's Finn we're talking about. He is staying in hospital and nobody tells me why." And I want to just pull him in my arms and comfort him and kiss his pouting lips until he smiles.

But I know he won't let me touch him for over three seconds, so I refrained from doing it so far.

I wanted to invite him to lay down in the bed with me instead of that uncomfortable chair, but than what would Stan think?

"What's going on, Stan?" I sigh, murmuring the words sadly and defeated. "What's bothering him?"

"A lot, but you shouldn't worry about it right now. If he wanted you to worry about it, he long would've told you himself."

"He isn't allowed."

"There's one thing I can tell you about Finn and the past two years, and that's how we found out Finn doesn't always play by the rules. If he wants you to know, he'll tell you anyway. But he doesn't, because he wants you to remember yourself."