Chapter 4

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"You're writing another one?" Jaiden echoed, "I guess so! I wasn't thinking!" Adam paced around Jaiden's room, his hands on his head. His brain felt as if it were going to burst, what more was there to say? And the chances of sneaking it again would be even harder, considering how suspicious James is now. "What are you going to say?" Jaiden asked, echoing his worries. "I don't know! And how am I gonna get it to him without him knowing?" Adam stopped pacing in a small circle to face Jaiden who sat idly in her desk chair. She lightly touched her chin, staring at the floor, "Maybe..." she trailed off. In defeat, Adam fell back onto Jaiden's bed to stare at the waxen-colored ceiling brightened up by the afternoon sunlight. After a good ten minutes of laconism as the two attempted to find some sort of way to make the best of the situation Adam put himself into,  Jaiden suddenly perked up. "Wait! I got an idea! Where's my notebook..." 

"Jaiden, this is insane."

"You have a note written, so I think a better thing to say to me right now is 'wow thanks Jaiden, you're so great!'"

"You're right."

Adam sighed as he gripped the finished note, Jaiden lightly set Adam's phone back on her desk beside him. Reading each line over and over, regretting it all. But there was no more hiding, the only way he could partially recover is to act cool about it. Since he couldn't bring himself to do it, Jaiden had to act as him to ask to meet James that evening. Since the park was a running theme in his deep surges of regret, they'd be meeting there. "There's no going back, is there?" Adam turned to Jaiden, "Nope, there wasn't any way to go back once you really threw yourself under the bus the last time we were at the park." She didn't humor him, and he didn't expect her to. "Do you think he knows?" Adam asked. All Jaiden could do was give a dubious shrug, which only made him more uneasy. He was quiet for a moment, before shyly asking, "Jaiden, you know him better than just about anyone else, do you think..." just like asking him himself, it felt impossible to query, "do you think he likes me too?" Jaiden's expression was unreadable for a moment before she smiled brightly, her eyes mischievously rested on something to the right of them as she rested her hand on Adam's shoulder. Adam couldn't help but mirror her big dumb smile, her wordless answer warmed his heart and removed a heap of doubt that resided inside of it.

With every step towards the park's entrance, Adam felt more and more nervous. The lilac sky provided a soft periwinkle tint on the whole park, it's tranquil nature wasn't enough to soothe his scattered thoughts. Jaiden seemed to have a good idea of how James felt, but was that true? What if even she didn't know, and she was just trying to make Adam feel better? What if tonight was the night that Adam lost his best friend? He'd have to hide away in his house forever in fear that he'd accidentally make eye contact with him at the grocery store, and Jaiden would have to get all of his groceries for him. He felt a strong pull away from the park, all the way from home. His bed awaited him, begging for his return. Though Adam did not heed his abode's call, forcing every fiber of his being to press on to the playground. Sitting alone on a bench was James, his cavity-inducing survey caused Adam's stomach to twist a little. "Hey." He choked out once he was in earshot, James turned to him with a smile, "There you are." James stood up to meet him, "So, why meet here?" he asked calmly. "Well," Adam began, lightly scratching his neck, "this place seems awfully connected to everything I've been regretting lately. So, I figured why not do this here." "Do what here?" James tilted his head. "Remember that letter I said I'd write?" Adam already felt the need to run away, but James simply nodded, did he really not catch on already? "Well..." Timidly, he pulled it out of his hoodie's pocket, "I finished it, and I was wondering if I could read it to you to make sure that it sounds alright." Adam gingerly unfolded it, upon doing so he looked back up at James. "Oh, sure." James's smile, though obviously endearing, was extremely hard to understand. He looked as if he knew something, but wasn't too sure. Did he suspect something else was afoot? Perhaps a letter to someone they knew, and he felt like a special little wing man. Or maybe he did know what Adam was doing, and he was just letting him do his thing, which if that was the case he couldn't help but feel grateful for such politeness. "Awesome." Adam smiled, nervously looking back down at the paper.

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