First Kiss Goodbye (An Arrow Season 3 fanfic)

First Kiss Goodbye

The words still echoed in her mind over and over.

"I love you... do you understand?"

She asked herself a countless times if it meant anything, even just a little. She knew it was staged, but it was more than an act for her. She wasn't sure about what Oliver thinks, but there was a tiny flicker of hope that maybe, maybe he meant those words. After all, he had asked her out to dinner.

Felicity pushed those thoughts away and reminded herself why she was there.

"Hey," she greeted, the sound of her voice coming out more like a croak. She cleared her throat to pacify her raging heartbeat.

"Sorry I'm late," he said, still standing in front of her. "You know how crazy it gets ever since Palmer arrived."

She understood and nodded.

"So what is it that you couldn't even tell me in front of Diggle?" He went straight to the point.

Felicity heaved a sigh, gathering up her courage as she fished out a paper from her purse. She handed it to Oliver with a shaky hand. She hoped he didn't notice.

But Oliver noticed, and he grew more concerned. Felicity has been acting strange the past two weeks. He couldn't blame her, though. Everything changed after that incident at the restaurant two weeks ago.

"What's this?" He asked, unfolding the paper.

"A resignation letter."

"A what?" He jerked up his head quickly to look at her face, but she was already averting her eyes. "Felicity--"

"It's effective immediately," she cut him off. "I'm resigning as your assistant at Queen Consolidated."

Oliver didn't bother to read the letter. He folded the paper and handed it back to her.

"I can't accept that," he said with a clenched jaw. He couldn't believe what she was doing.

"Yes, you can," Felicity insisted, shoving it back to him. "I need to be formal about this as much as possible if I want to get a new job at--"

"You don't need a new job, Felicity." It was Oliver's turn to interrupt, his voice a pitch higher. He closed his eyes, pressed his lips tight and took a deep breath. His chest was now hammering out of irritation than nervousness.

Neither of them said a word at each other for a minute. Felicity turned her body back to the table and gripped her mug with both hands. Oliver remained standing, one hand resting on his waist and the other one pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger.

"Is this about what I said to you at your apartment? Right after you got out of the hospital?" Oliver asked, turning back to her. "Because I know things have been complicated the past two weeks."

"It's not about that," Felicity said, her eyes fixed on her coffee gone cold.

She didn't trust her words anymore. She knew a part of that incident at the restaurant has to do with her decision to leave Queen Consolidated and Starling City, but the truth hurts more than she could admit it. It was their first date, which seemed to be their last. But Oliver's past resurfaced, and she found herself fighting for her life in the middle of it.

A few days after, Oliver visited her at her apartment and told her they couldn't be more than partners at "work". Life would never be normal for Oliver Queen, he said, and she didn't deserve that.

Felicity had been meaning to answer back at that time, but the painkillers messed up her mind.

This time, she can think straight. She wished, though, that there were painkillers for her aching heart.