chapter 1
Farquaad Diary
Dear diary
I find myself growing tired of women, it seems like every last one of them is after me because I'm metrosexual I'm as sensitive as the nipples of a pregnant cow who's just been milked. Wishing I could just bust open like a sea horse giving birth, free from the restrains of society and ideals of what's normal. I watched "Love Simon" yesterday with Thelonius *sighhh* I knew even before them movie that I was different from other men but the movie just made it even more clear. Oh how I wished I was Simon free to be embraced by my lovers strong arms. I close my eyes imagining me on top of the Ferris wheel with The ginger bread man holding me tight. The smell of cinnamon aftershave fills my nose and I lean in and whisper into his ear "I love your gum drop buttons" he whispers back "I'll gum drop you tonight". But the fantasy in my mind is short lived as I'm brought back to reality. I've given up on the hopes of finding someone who will understand me, I've settled for a body pillow of Thelonius. His big strong body and presence make me quiver and melt into nothing, he's the ideal type of man for me. But I'll settle for my imagination.
I wrote this at 2:00am while I'm the phone with my friend and it was a joke but I'm really having fun writing this cancer LOL also I have so many typos because I write what Comes to mind. I'm gonna update once a week but I'll try for everyday.
VOUS LISEZ
I like penis in my mouth
RomanceTwo bros chillin in a hot tub five feet apart cause they're not gay.....or are they??? One upon a time there was a love story so undeniably gay that it made all other gay relationships look heterosexual. Lord farquaard is a lonely bachelor who want...
