JJBA fluff/One-Shots

Pillarmen {Understanding}

A/N: This one is kind of like Blankets and Worry. This is more of a vent chapter so it'll be kinda sad I guess? That's probably not the right word, oh well. 

You layed on your back on the cold stone floor of your small room. The contact of the stone was so cold it almost burned but nothing hurt worse than the wave of guilt that had crashed over you. In one hand you held a blunt pair of scissors in the other small, red lines. Your things were strewn about the room, almost as if a tornado had torn it apart. You hummed a light tune, on that you hadn't heard for years as hot tears streamed down your cheeks. 

You let out a shaky sigh and lazily tossed the scissors away. Hurting yourself wouldn't fix what you had done. You finally understood and it was all too much. Everything was your fault, the fights, the tears, the goodbyes. It was always your fault. It was as if a little part of your brain had been playing puppet master all along as if you had done it all on purpose. 

You laughed, igniting sparks of pain in your ribs. You laughed again, a savage, maniacal sound. You covered your face with your bloodied hand, the salt from your tears burning your wounds. Suddenly, you stopped. You couldn't laugh anymore. How peculiar. It took you a moment to realize that you had stopped breathing. 

Gasping for air, you sat up and wrapped your arms around your stomach. You didn't hear the footsteps coming down the hallway as you choked on your own breath. 

"(Y/N)!" The voice startled you. You looked up to see two of the pillarmen standing before you with horrified expressions. You scowled, how dare they. How dare they! How dare they what? Why did you hate them? For standing where they stood? You had no idea. 

"Leave me." You could picture the words flowing out of your mouth.  What you heard you could barely decipher. The two pillarmen kneeled by your side, you recognized them as Wamuu and Esidisi. Wamuu reached out to touch you but pulled back his hand. You looked down at your legs they too were covered in red lines. Except these lines were deep, jagged. When had that happened?

"(Y/N), what have you done?" Esidisi asked, placing a warm hand on your jaw. 

"You must reap what you sow," you croaked with a sad smile. "This was of my own undoing." You could hear there alarmed voices, they seemed so close yet so far away. You looked into Wamuu's beautiful blue eyes as you resigned your last, painful breath. It wasn't near what you deserved, but it would do.