Contest Entries

Is This Real?

My paintbrush gilded smoothly across the plain white canvas masking it with a layer of colourful lies.

That was what had become of my life, I hid behind a veil protecting me from everyone's sympathy. My life was completely blank without him and I was filling it with colours on my own half-heartedly when it was always him who filled my world with colours.

The day I lost him, I decided that I was done with attachments. It feels like a favourite toy being taken away from a child or your heart being ripped out of the chest.

That's how empty I felt.

Lost into an abyss of dark thoughts of giving up I didn't realise I was almost finishing up my painting and the only part left were the eyes.

Blue eyes as bright as the summer skies or as dark as storms invaded my thoughts.

In a dilemma over the two, I decided on merging the shades because I had seen both the sides of those eyes- Clouded with adoration, happiness, lust, anger and all the while containing love for me.

I saw no possibility that someone could love me in the way he did.

The canvas was done, I stepped back to admire it and as soon as I snapped out of the trance I was in, the realization of what had transferred from my mind onto the canvas settled in.

I drew him. Perfect details, just the way I remembered him, dimpled wide grin, heart shaped lips, curly brown hair and those mesmerising blue eyes of him which I adored.

I gasped at my own painting, my hand flew to my mouth, I stumbled backwards till my knees finally bucked and gave away.

For a moment I felt completely numb as if I'd never known any emotions but soon it passed and waves of despair knocked me out.

There was a plane crash which killed my lover.

I refused to believe at first and when it dawned on me, I went crazy, I screamed and shouted and cursed at god, all while sobbing uncontrollably.

Three weeks and I had no idea about that case for I had cut any kind of contact with the outside world, smashed my television, phone and radio.
I suffered alone in silence.

Now the feelings and emotions had returned mightier than ever squeezing me of any drop of energy.
The screams were no longer held back by shackles in my throat and like a wild beast, they escaped me one after the another.

I could shed tears again, I could feel again but if all I could feel was pain, I'd rather go numb. Unstoppable sobs racked through me and my eyelids started to get heavier from fatigue.

I was on the verge of unconsciousness right then and there but then I detected a sweet perfume. My heart immediately knew to whom it belonged.

I rose up to my feet fighting off my fatigue and followed my racing heart leading to my love.

There he stood in all his glory with arms wide open for me to run into.
It was like a thirsty traveller finding an oasis in the middle of the desert or a refugee finally getting solace.

He enveloped me into his arms and rocked us back and forth in a fixed rhythm.
My brown eyes met his blue ones, my racing heart met his steady heart and it wasn't much time before my lips met his.

I didn't open my eyes when I pulled away from the kiss. I was in his arms finally and I knew that if I'd open my eyes, he would be gone.

"Don't leave me." I spoke in a cracked voice from all the crying.

"I never did, I never will." He replied so soothingly that I almost believed it all being real.

"The plane-"

"Crashed but some survived." He completed for me.

"Open your eyes." He pleaded but I denied.

"Is this real?" I asked but didn't hear the other end of it as I finally drifted off into unconsciousness in the comfort of his warm arms around me.

Maybe he really was back or maybe it was just a trick of my mind.

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This is my entry for contest number #24

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