Finding Him

chapter one: the beginning

My more youthful self believed in an irreplaceable energy between souls. An energy that cannot be found easily. An energy that connects individuals in a moment, and they stay connected forever.

It is uncommon to understand this energy, but even more uncommon to truly experience it.

I have experienced this energy. It is my lifeline, and my motivation to get up every morning. It is what I live for. This connection, this energy, is what makes a person more alive. It cannot be found anywhere else.

Perhaps that is the reason why I have been so miserable this entire year. That energy has left my life. It is completely gone. Not even a speck of that energy is left in my life. I miss it.

However it is much easier to blame my suffering on someone else. I have blamed it on her this entire year: Headmistress Lilith.

Lilith is our new headmistress of our school Sweet Falls Preparatory in this year, 3000. Poor test scores and drug problems got our old headmaster fired. I thought it would be a better year where I could have freedom and hope.

I can see her in my head now. She stands in front of the podium in our school auditorium on the first day in her annoying strict voice saying, "A new start," she said. "Things will improve in this school. Forget everything before me, because, now, I am in charge."

She would brush her fingers through her bangs on her short brown/grayish pin curled hair that reaches her ears and readjust her all black suit. She always wanted to be perfect. That made her so frustrated with her life if you ask me. Every time I've seen her, her mouth would always be in a wrinkled frown and her dark eyebrows in a deep furrow. She was so angry at the world.

She was right in a way in her speech though. Things were going to change. But not for the better. Every rule that could be put into place, was put into place. 10 hour school days with one break for lunch.

Time spent having fun with friends was basically impossible. So it wasn't surprising how music and art programs were shut down and those teachers were laid off. Barely any interaction. No fun ever. Production and hard work was the only goal, all the time. Lilith discouraged it so much that it didn't even seem fun anymore. I can hear her voice again in the back of my mind, "socially connecting with others limits the time spent intellectually."

The only time where we could communicate with friends was during lunch. Which is where I am now.

I am leaning against the white wall of the school, watching Asher dribble the ball up and down the court. He runs past his friend who tried to block and dunks the basketball right over him. As soon as he scores, his bright blue eyes light up as they lock in with mine. He gives me a pearly white smile and calls my name:

"Kiana!"

I smile and give a small chuckle. Oh boy, here we go again. I uncross my arms and walk casually closer to the center of the court where he stood. My wavy long brown hair blows in the breeze as I walk over to him.

I stand much shorter in front of Asher's tall, tan, muscular frame. He is wearing the school uniform: white button up, black pants, and black shoes, like usual. Everyday all the boys are forced to wear that. Besides that, he can be characterized by his light sunny blonde hair and light blue eyes. His hair is slightly wavy and falls just below his ears. His light blue eyes stand out against his blonde thick eyebrows and tan skin. He also has nicely shaped light pink lips that cover a set of straight white teeth.

His friend stands next to him, matching him in the same uniform. His friend is named Milo. He stands out with his auburn colored hair that makes you question whether or not he is a redhead or a brunette. He also has pale skin, freckles, and kind, dark brown eyes. He has a tall lean frame, and he's fairly shy most of the time. Very different from Asher's outgoing personality.