Broken Love

•One•

"I can't do this anymore. It's over" and with that he walks away. He not only walks away from me but he walks away from what we had and I can honestly say it was amazing.
Watching him away literally broke my heart and all I could think to do was sit down where I was and bring my knees up to my face to cry into them.

I've just lost the love of my life and my best friend all in one.

Luke has always been the person I've told everything to, from gossip I overheard at school to personal problems of my own. We've been together just under 16 months when he started being funny with me and refusing to talk to me. It hurts. A lot.

I'd be lying if I said that this was totally unexpected, this is actually the fourth time we've broken up in 16 months and all for different reasons but it's always been him that's ended things and then came running back just hours later. As I sit here on the floor I hope and I pray that this time will be the same but something is my head is telling me that this is it. That this time.. it's really over, and that breaks my heart.

I've always believed he deserved better than me and I've always believed I'm not good enough. I'm relatively small with being 5'4. I'm a natural brunette but I'm going through my red hair phase at the moment and have been for 7 months. I have green eyes and I literally have nothing going for me. I don't have the big bum or the big boobs that every boy wants. The only thing I have is the hourglass figure, yet I'm still a size 6.
Like made me feel different about the way I saw myself. He told me I'm beautiful every day and that my body is amazing and I never believed him. Instead I'd roll my eyes at him but always smile right after.
I'm incredibly insecure about myself and I'd always worry that when I denied the compliments he gave me, he would think I was just doing it for attention. But I didn't deny them for the attention or because I liked hearing it but I do it because that's the way I truly feel and I don't feel I deserve the compliments given. I know my own flaws better than anyone else so they stand out to me more than anyone else. So when I look at myself I don't see what everyone else apparently sees.

All of a sudden I feel someone's presence beside me but I don't look up. I just can't bring myself to do it. I feel then put there arm round me and then rest their head on it which makes me realise who it is. I lift up my head and instantly throw my arms around my best friend and cry into her shoulder

"Hey, listen to me okay, you're better than this" I don't do anything but cry harder because deep down I know I'm not better than this.

"He left me Bella. He.. he left" I stutter on the words due to the amount of crying I'm doing. My chest is coming tired and it's getting harder and harder to breathe. Becca notices and picks me up walking with her arm around my waist to stabilise me.

"We'll talk when you're ready okay. We have time" her words sooth me just like they always have. Me and Bella have been best friends since nursery when we were four, we are now 17 nearly and still going strong. Without her I know I couldn't have gotten through half the stuff I have. She makes me a stronger person..

So did Luke.. but now that he's gone I feel lost. Empty. Like my heart has literally just been ripped into a million pieces and it hurts knowing he's the only one that can fix it...