The Clancy Journal Entries Part One

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I made it out. I feel weightless.I know that place had always held me down, but for the first time, I can feel the levity that I had hoped for. It's been three nights now, and my breathing has changed-it's slower, and more full. It's like the air out here is actually worth taking in. I can see it back in the distance, and i'd be lying if I said that it wasn't constantly on my mind. I wish I could turn that fear off, but maybe the farther I go, the less the fear will affect me. I feel betrayed by what I assumed was home.-If I ever end up back there, I won't be able to look at it the same way. They are asleep. They're so sure that they know the truth, and carry on throughout through their day with the same meaningless tasks. They've forgotten to look up, and look outward. To understand that this isn't about "in there". This is about "out here". The new world surrounds me.I used to think the walls back home were massive- these green cliffs engulf me, and place me right in the middle- Trench is quite precarious at times, and it's easy to grow weary. But it's real, and it's true, and I'd much rather endure reality, then to mindlessly be obedient to a life that someone else created for me. I've obsessed about this world for so long, that it feels more like home than anything I've experienced. Somehow in the vast openness, I feel more protected than ever. The landscape feels endless, and I've found myself walking for hours without any true evidence of getting further down. But I've seen plants and colors out here that i'm not sure I've witnessed before. There's a beauty in the strangest places,- and the curiosity of what's next continues to motivate me. I wonder who else is out here. If what I assumed inside is true, there's got to be more like me. Sometimes I'll feel pressure, or I think I see something in my periphery, only to look up and see nothing. It's just another thing that i'm afraid of that also excites me. It all just confirms all of the things that I hoped to be true for all of this time. I am out here and I am very alive. I'm sometimes scared, but always discovering something new, and I will not stop. Cover me!

 -Clancy


-credit to twenty one pilots-


Find the original Clancy journal entries here: http://dmaorg.info/found/15398642_14/clancy.php


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