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"there's a party at her house this weekend. we should all go," my best friend, kory, says.

"oh please," i say. "you're just looking for a boy to kiss."

he laughs a little, "maybe, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't go. what if you meet the man of your dreams?"

"fine, i'll go. but only because you're really looking forward to finding a boyfriend. you know i hate parties."

"okay great," he smiles. "just wear something cute, and something that'll stand out. you need to meet someone, too."

i roll my eyes. i know he just wants to help me get a guy, but honestly, i don't care anymore. i'm done with guys. they're too much to handle, and none of them are nice. besides, no one likes me anyway.

"kory, i'm not flirting with some kid to help you get some.. man for the night. there's no point when we both know the relationship will only last five seconds."

"it won't last five seconds, i promise. it'll be a relationship that lasts a lifetime," he says. "you need to lighten up a bit, and start talking to guys again."

"oh, my god, we'll most likely be drunk. do you really think we'll remember who they are the next day if we get drunk?"

"colleen," he sighs. "you're too stubborn."

i shake my head. no guy is ever gonna want to hang out with me again. i'm not that type of girl that goes to parties and drinks, and dances on some poor stranger. the guy will most likely think i'm not worth his time, anyway.

"whatever, kory," i cross my arms. "i'll.. try to flirt with guys if that's what satisfies you."

"great!" he says and hugs me, tightly, "it's friday night at 8. be ready by 7:45 and i'll come pick you up. it's gonna be so much fun!"

i roll my eyes again and force a smile on my face. i have a feeling this is going to be the worst night of my life.

-

wednesday rolled by, too soon if you ask me, and kory and i had already asked a couple of our friends if they wanted to go to this party. just so you know, the party is being held by a bunch of our old high school and college friends, that we lost connection with. so, yes, it's gonna be awkward, ugh.

right now, i'm having lunch with teeny and rachel, who are both going to the party. i begged rachel to come with me because i needed someone there that reminded me of home, not that kory doesn't, i just wanted my little sister there.

"we have to get you a hot outfit," teeny says. "this is your chance, colleen, to find the one guy."

i shake my head, "i'm sorry, but i'm not dressing to impress at this party. i'm just wearing a t shirt and jeans. screw what everyone thinks."

"a t shirt and a pair of jeans? are you kidding me? you wear that almost every day, why not change it up a bit?" teeny asks.

"because t," i sigh, beginning to get angry. "i'm only going to this stupid thing for kory. i'm not looking for a man to lean into and tell all my problems to."

"okay, but at least wear a low cut shirt. i'm gonna wear a dress, and i'm sure rachel will wear something hot to make you feel better."

"teeny, we all know you're wearing something to impress your husband," rachel says, laughing. "he's obviously going with you."

teeny laughs with rachel, and i become furious. i know i shouldn't be, and it isn't my place to tell teeny not to be excited about it, but hearing them both so happy and laughing about it makes me upset.

"you know what," i say, grabbing my bags and my food tray. "i'm not going. i'm tired of all of this."  i throw away my trash, and walk to my car, driving to my house. who cares about a stupid party, anyway?

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