Remember Me [harry styles] ✓

11 - When enough is enough

Eve barely manages a goodbye in response before I've ended the call and flung my phone into the centre of the bed. I owe her the world's biggest apology when I've finished up here, that's for sure. 

Harry looks nervous as he makes his way into the room; playing anxiously with the room key until he reaches the foot of the bed. I'm still sprawled on my stomach and quickly push myself upwards so that I'm more appropriately sat facing him instead. 

"You ok?" He asks, breaking the awkward silence that seems to have developed. 

Yeah great, Harry. Just casually losing my shit over the fact that you clearly remembered me at some point in the last two years but didn't feel the need to do anything about it and now we're stuck sharing a hotel room...

"Fine. You?"  

He's pursing his lips as though he can see right through me. He knows full well that I'm not fine. Just as I know full well that he's about to lie to me as well. 

"I'm ok." 

I watch him approach the bed and tentatively take a seat beside me, the room key still clutched in his grasp. I don't know which one of us is supposed to start this conversation, only that it's going to happen and it suddenly feels an awful lot like the moment we were sat opposite one another in the gelato store. I'm not convinced I'll ever feel like I'm not worried about him doing a runner.

"Alright, Juni, enough is enough." 

I'm taken back by his tone. He sounds disappointed and I'm not entirely sure if it's aimed at me or himself. My heart is throbbing so violently under my rib cage that I'm almost certain even Harry can hear it. 

"I wrote Sweet Creature towards the end of twenty-sixteen. I was on a writing retreat with my production team and let's just say it was the first time in a while that I actually had some time to think." 

This sounds like more bollocks about him "forgetting" but my brain has refused to form words and my mouth seems to be refusing to produce any, so I continue to sit in silence, gripping the doona so tightly that I've got pins and needles in my hands. 

"You must know that I never forgot you, Juni. I just forgot to write and stay in touch. It was one of those things always in the back of my brain - must write to Juniper, must remember to tell Juni about that, must find out what she's up to these days. And I just didn't do it. It sounds dreadful when I say it out loud, but it just didn't become priority anymore. And occasionally I'd see something that reminded me of you and I'd think - I should tell Juni about that! But then for whatever reason, whether it was because I was on tour or recording or promoting - I'd forget. But not you, Juni. I'd never forget you."

I can't help feeling like he's going for one of those Rom-Com speeches, like Kat to Patrick in 10 Things I hate About You, or Noah to Allie in The Notebook. 

"So, while we were on this retreat, I ended up writing Sweet Creature about you. You should listen to the song, Juni."

I'm not sure I want to listen to the song, but I'm nodding anyway. 

"And even then, even after putting all that effort into writing and recording your song - I still never made the effort to say hello. And for that, I am truly very sorry." 

At least five minutes passes before I realise that Harry has stopped speaking. It's only because of the air-conditioning unit over head randomly kicking into life that I realised it had gone silent at all. My eyes are fixed on the room key that continues to have the life squeezed out of it by his large hands and my heart continues to assault my ribs. 

I just can't seem to move past the fact that six years of continuous friendship ended because he simply forgot. I know his life is far from simple and I'm far from extraordinary. 

But what if he forgets again?

"I don't know what to say, Harry." I sigh and rub my hands over my face. Tonight has been never-ending and it's only just hit me how tired I am. It's almost hard to believe that I was at work only hours ago, holding myself back from tearing Persistent Penny's head off. 

"You've got to help me out here, Juniper." He sighs and falls backwards onto the bed. The mattress bounces beneath me like a rippling wave and I tilt my head down to face him. He wears a pained expression and his hair has fallen into his eyes. "You told me you wanted answers and I told you I'd give you them. I have and now we've hit a dead end." 

Admittedly, my plan only ever extended this far. I'd go to Harry's show, confront him and he would answer that million dollar question. It might not have quite worked out that way but regardless, we've reached that point now. I never put much thought into what happens next and quite honestly I'm completely stumped as to where we go from here.

I think of Eve, counselling me over the phone with her most disapproving tone - if he can't see how ripper you are then screw 'im. 

Can Harry see how ripper I am? 

"What do you think we should do?" My voice is timid, almost squeaky, and Harry's eyes snap from the ceiling to my face. He pushes himself back up into a sitting position and watches me warily. Between the two of us, we've already managed to mess up the nicely made bed. "Am I worth your time now?"

"Argh, Juni." He groans and my lips twitch with amusement. It's nice to see him squirm for a change. "You've always been worth my time, I've just been too much of a idiot to give it to you." 

He's saying all the right things, I think. 

"So what should we do?" I ask again.  

"I think you should give me another chance to be your friend." His eyes are bright and hopeful and for a brief moment, I can see his sixteen year old self in there. The one with the purple Jack Wills hoodie and the cherub curls. The one I refused to give up on. "Please, Juni. I won't let you down again, I promise." 

The air-cons shuts off, rendering us in total silence again and I draw my lower lip into my mouth. We've come this far, Harry and I. Should I let it go further? 

"I won't be waiting for another eight years if you do." I tell him quietly and his eyes widen like a child's on Christmas Day. 

"You mean it?" He's clearly not quite sure whether to believe me or not. I'm not entirely sure myself. 

I nod. "I mean it." 

And then suddenly he's engulfing me in a bone-crushing hug, the kind that squeezes the oxygen from your lungs and squishes your face unattractively against the other person's chest. I can't help laughing, it bursts out of my mouth with determination. The vibration of the body attached to mine tells me Harry's laughing too.

"You still haven't answered my question, by the way." He says after a few moments of clinging to one another. I'm almost reluctant to let go, in case he vanishes again.

"Which question was that?" I reply and untangle myself from him, albeit begrudgingly.

His lips curve up into a smirk. "Do you or do you not have a pet kangaroo yet?"

author's note: Is Harry going to stay true to his word??