What if I stayed ?

Chapter 2

" He is just like you , he is a monster like you. He is cold hearted and feeling less. He is a fool and stupid human being. "

" I'm gonna kill you " he tightens his hands and lays her on the floor , he is almost suffocates her.

" Leave her or I'll kill you. " her mom threats him while she pulled a knife on his neck " do it now " she screams at him. He takes his hands off. " You know this isn't the end , I'm gonna leave now , but you both are gonna pay me for this " says her grandpa.

He gets up from her and leaves.

" Hayal are you ok ? Look at me , should I call an ambulance ? "

" Why didn't you let him kill me, mom ? Every minute that I live is more painful , every breath that I take burns my lungs even more. I don't want to live my life like this. " she answered with that crying voice that broke her mom , while she was laying on the floor trying hardly to catch her breath she couldn't stop crying out loud. Her mom couldn't even say a single word. She took both of her hands trying to cover her mouth from screaming , seeing her daughter like this broke her in thousand pieces , hearing her daughter talk like this ended her world. Time passed by but none off them moved , Hayal's mom just looked her daughter and cried in silence. 

" Hayal, I'm really sorry. I'm really sorry about everything that happened to you, everything that happened to you from the day that you were born. "

" It's not your fault , mom. " She gets up and goes in her room and locks the door. She doesn't have the power to go to her bed, she falls on her knees and continues crying.

She walks on her knees and takes her diary, and starts writing.

" Dear diary, I died. I died in every single breath that I was taking. In every morning that I woke up. In every step, in every food that I took. In every good word that said. In every "I'm fine " that I said. In every day. In every day that I smiled and laughed like I was the most happiest person in the world. That was fake, that was acting. I just wanted people not to judge me. I was burning inside and I was smiling , instead of screaming and crying I was laughing. My life ended in every single day. I never was alive. I suffered in every single moment. I enjoyed all the pain in the world. I never told somebody about how much I'm suffering, because in reality nobody really gives a fuck.

I'm dead inside, so WHY AM I STILL BREATHING ? "

At this moment I notice that I should end it , I should end this endless pain. She gets up , and goes to the bathroom, only thing that is her mind right now is grandpa's razorblade. She takes that and goes back on her room , Nobody saw her. She locks the door , and without thinking twice she starts cutting her hand , she doesn't even make a single sound.

It's ok Hayal, the pain that you're feeling inside is more stronger than this. You have to end it. You should, you don't have other choice. This is the only way to stop it.

Somebody rings the doorbell , Hayal's mom opens the door. It's Yusuf.

" Hi , Mrs. Walker. Sorry for interrupting you , is Hayal home ? "

" Hi Mr. Omar's son , how're you doing? "

" I'm fine , thank you. I came to give Hayal something that she forgot at my house. "

" Ok, wait I'll tell her that you're here. "

She goes to Hayal's room , the door is locked. She knock on her door " Hayal , are you sleeping ? Mr. Omar's son is here, he wants to see you. Do you hear me ?

Hayal open the door, please you're making me worry. Honey answer me. "

Yusuf hears her screaming and runs in.