[Setting: Night club]
JERRY: My parents live in Florida now. They moved there last year. They didn't want to move to Floriday, but they're in their sixties, and that's the law. You know
how it works. They got the leisure police. They pull up in front of the old people's house with a golf cart, jump out, "Let's go Pop, white belt, white pants, white
shoes, get in the back. Drop the snow shovel right there, drop it!" I am not much for the family gathering. You know, you sit there, and the conversation's so boring.
It's so dull. And you start to fantasize. You know, you think, what if I just got up and jumped out that window? What would it be like? Just crashed right through the
glass.. You know. Come back in, there's broken glass, everybody's all upset. "No, I'm alright. I was just a little bored, there. No, I'm fine. I came back. I wanted to
hear a little about that Hummel collection, Aunt Rose. Let's pick it up right there."
[Setting: Jerry's apartment]
(Jerry's parents are in town. His father's watching T.V., his mother is ironing his father's jackets)
HELEN: (To Morty) You have so many nice jackets. I don't know why you had to bring this jacket. Who wears a jacket like this? (He doesn't respond) What's
wrong with that nice gray one? You have beautiful clothes. They sit in your closet. Morty, you can't wear - this!
(Phone rings)
MORTY: Are you getting that?
HELEN: I thought you were getting it.
MORTY: Should I pick up?
HELEN: You want me to get that?
MORTY: I'll get it!
HELEN: I'll get it!
(They both go for the phone, Helen gets to it first)
HELEN: Hello?.. Hello?
(She hangs up. Jerry enters - he's wearing baseball clothes and carrying a bat and glove)
JERRY: (Talking about the loud T.V.) Would you make this thing lower! I can hear it on the street! (Turns it off)
MORTY: So, how'd you do?
JERRY: We won. I made an incredible play in the field! There was a tag-up at third base and I threw the guy out from left field on a fly! We'll be in the championship
game Wednesday because of me. It was the single greatest moment of my life.
HELEN: This is your greatest moment? A game?
JERRY: Well, no. Sharon Besser, of course.
MORTY: You know what my greatest moment was, don't you? 1946. I went to work for Harry Flemming and I came up with the idea for the beltless trench coat.
HELEN: Jerry, look at this sport jacket. Is this a jacket to wear to an anniversary party?
JERRY: Well, the man's an individualist. He worked for Harry Flemming. He knows what he's doing.
HELEN: But it's their 50th anniversary.
MORTY: You know, I spoke to Manya and Isaac on the phone today. They invited you again. I think you should go.
JERRY: First of all, I made plans with Elaine.
HELEN: So bring her.
JERRY: I don't even know them. What is she, your second cousin? I mean, I've met them three times in my life.
