The Gynecologist

Lost

Anger was feeling in my owl body as I was packing this brown box with all the hings I had on my desk. Pen, binders and other things. By boss is cutting the budget and taught that a secretary was useless. Then let's see if he doesn't call me back in a couple weeks! I left the heavy box in my arms and took my purse. "Need a taxi or something?" My rich bank boss ask me from his office, like if he fucking care. "Never!" I told him before slamming the door shut and started to walk to the elevator. I walk in the subway in the middle of the day there wasn't much people, the only thing that you could her was me swearing in those big hallways waiting for the transport to arrive. Walking around town fast with a heavy box in the arms would make many people just freak out. I just let it all in until I reach my apartment. I open the door and threw the box from top of my arms, it crash on the floor. I close behind me and took off my heels angrily. I rested my back on the door and look in the blank. Thinking that I had to find a job and fast if I want to keep this apartment. My world was falling apart because of money, money always roll the world you know?! Good people never get a fucking chance in this world. They are too nice so the liars take all they have making fake promises and then they leave them with nothing. That what just happened to me. I slowly let myself fall to the floor, the pain and sadness making their way into me making my eyes all watery. I let myself go sobbing hard. It felt good but I needed something more to feel better. I got up on my tired feet and put the new CD I just bought. The Flood by Of Mice & Men, the screaming of the singer was just what I needed. I wasn't able to scream and express myself like him so I needed someone to do it for me. 

After listening to the owl CD, screaming like crazy in my apartment that I was scared that someone had call the police. But it's true! There wasn't anyone in the building when it's only 1in the afternoon, because people are working! 

I wanted to work so bad! I'm a hard worker and I do the best I can in my job! I need it to buy myself some band merch and tickets show! It's maybe crazy to be in love with bands when you'r 27 years old but fuck all the ones who judge! Those bands saved my life you didn't! I had made tattoos representing how they helped me and no body could ever notice because they were on my thigh, stomach and back. I love them! Some are colorful, others are black and grey style. So that's why I needed a job! And for my mental health because I don't like being alone in here and have nothing to do. I just didn't like that you know? And I didn't had any boyfriend and I didn't feel like having any. 

I brush my brown strait hair and got to sleep. Oh and I'm Mary by the way!