Confessions of a Muslim Girl

Chapter 30 -- My Crazy Family, Love, and Heartbreak

            His face shifts from relieved to shock. I wince mentally. “What are you talking about?”

            “Nothing.” I get up to leave.

            “Maysa, stop.” His tone is commanding and authoritative.

            I whip around. “What?!”

            “Tell me what you mean.”

            I shoot him a dry look. “Or what? You’ll set Shazia on me? Because she already hates me enough.” It’s like someone programmed a biyotchy-comment generator where my brain is supposed to be.

            “What the hell do you have against Shazia? I don’t understand why you two don’t like each other!” He nearly yells in frustration.

            “You’d have to be an idiot not to understand why.”

            “Well, I guess I’m in idiot then.”

            “Yeah, yeah you are.” I hiss out.

            “So tell me what you mean.”

            “No.”

            “Why? Since when are you all talk and no action?”

            “Since when are you all action and no talk? Huh? Because you seemed pretty damn comfortable with Shazia’s arm around you, but for some damn reason, you and I don’t even talk anymore. That’s what I mean, Adam.”

            I try my best to stay calm. That’s who I am; the calm one. The collected one. The one that doesn’t let her emotions show. God, you get the idea.

            “So this is about why we haven’t been talking recently?” He asks cluelessly.

            If I had a stick, umbrella, anything right now, I would have used it to give Adam a good smack upside the head. You idiot! I want to scream.

            “Oh my God.” I pinch the bridge of my nose.

            “Because I could say the exact same thing to you.”

             “Wait, what? “What’s that supposed to mean?”

            He shrugs and starts to walk away. I grab his arm before I can think and shout, “OH HELL NO! You are not walking away from me.” I push him back lightly so that he falls back onto the couch and sits up; I cross my arms and wait for him to say something. It’s only then that I realize that I just touched him. The heat flames to my cheeks when I realize my mistake. Ya Allah it was a mistake. Please forgive me. I make a note to pray for forgiveness after Isha namaz.

            He stands up and laughs mirthlessly. “I could say the same thing about you. You don’t seem to have a problem with Drew putting his arm around you yet we can’t even talk without you yelling at me.”

            I bristle at his mentioning of Drew. “I was about to tell Drew to stop!”

            “Same thing with me and Shazia.”

            Infuriating bo—“Shazia knows about the no-touching rule! Drew doesn’t! The situations are utterly different!” I shout.

            His silence fills me with dread. He likes her. God, he likes her. “Shazia and I have nothing between us.” He growls.

            I raise an eyebrow and refrain from snorting in disbelief. “Ok, Adam.”