I Am Bree - Book 1

Chapter 8 - A Year

It had been my duty since the dismissal of the last footman to wait table at mealtimes. This particular night, I didn't have much to do. Apparently, I was there at Annabella and Flora's request that I should hear their plans. Perhaps, they thought I'd be jealous, but they didn't realized how pleased I was at the prospect of remaining at the house.

I was to have myself to myself for several weeks. I could finally bathe and maybe find time to wash and patch my worn clothes. As a matter of fact, I could do whatever I wanted, and nothing could have made me happier.

"Indeed, Angela would have no place there. She would only disgrace us." Flora's gaze went to Adella as she spoke, looking for approval, but Adell pointedly ignored her.

"Mother, what about maids? We cannot go into society without maids. It wouldn't be proper." Adella's lips were tight, and it was clear she had been considering this for some time.

"That's true. I'm not sure where we'll find them. Your father used to take care of such things; it was the one thing he was good at." Mother forgot her food and stared blankly at the wall as though it would give her some sort of inspiration.

"Why don't we have Angela tell us what to do? She was always with Father when he got things ready." Annabella piped in—probably hoping to increase my discomfort. I found myself in an awkward situation suddenly as all eyes turned to me.

"I wouldn't know much about such things. If my ladies will care to remember, I never got the chance to attend." I offered slowly. Mother snorted and turned back to her meal. "However, if you truly want to know what I think, I think you should forgo as much as possible. With the debt we've incurred, there is no extra money to spend on finery or, in fact, on anything at all. People would understand if you were unable to attend due to financial trouble." I didn't know why I spoke. Perhaps somewhere in my heart, I still cared what happened to them, and despite their cruelty, they were my means of survival, too. What would we do when it came time to pay the bills and there was no money? They all rounded on me as the words came out of my mouth, dumbfounded at the very suggestion. Adella was the first to recover.

"As you said yourself, you've never attended, and you don't know anything about it. Besides, if money is tight, it's only because you cost so much to keep. If you worked half as hard as you did when you ate, we'd be in a much better place." She snapped. An obvious lie. "You needn't worry about it. It's not your place to meddle in our affairs." Her eyes narrowed into slits as she examined me before her gaze shifted to Mother, and she ignored me again. "I shan't go unless I have a maid, and that's final!" She spoke with such force that even Mother was taken aback.

"But, darling, you can't possibly mean that!" Mother leaned forward in her chair, almost breathless. For once, she forgot the food that had been placed in front of her. "You must catch his eye. You know that as well as I do. If you don't go, how will he ever notice you?" She was aghast, but Adella was firm, her lips tightening into a hard line.

"No, Mother, I shan't have it. Either I get a mad or I stay home, plan or no plan!" She slurped her wine and pointedly stared at a wall. I could tell she was egging Mother on, trying to find a soft spot, so she could get what she wanted. I'd seen her do it hundreds of times, but Mother never seemed to notice. At this point, I didn't know what she could want. She already had everything money—or no money, as the case may be—could buy.

"Well. . ." Mother downed her wine and stared at the dazzling crystal on the table—a new investment that had to be dusted and polished every hour to give it the proper shine. "I think you'd better change your mind, love. This could be your last chance! You know his father grows impatient. Soon, he'll be sending him to some foreign place to find a bride, and then what will become of you?"