Thorn [Farkle Minkus]

[04] Heartache

It's been seven months. Seven months since Ellie last saw her father. Seven months since her family were together. Sevens months since she and her family where able to be together. It hurts to know that her family will never be able to be a proper family.

Most nights, Ellie's mother was gone. She was either out of New York on business or going out on dates with different men. To Ellie, it seems like her mother missed being with someone. She misses the feeling of being loved by a man. Since then, Ellie, Tyler and Justin were left in the care of their butler and their maid. William and Anna have taken the role of parents over the Turner siblings when their father never bothered to try and see them and when their mother is too bus to pay attention.

Ellie wasn't surprised. Her mother had promised to be around more, but she only broke it. Her mother spent most days out of the apartment.

From how often her mother is traveling for work or out with friends or on dates, Ellie began to wonder if she actually comes home. She wonders if her mother just spends the night with whoever she went on a date with or at her friends place. She wonders if her mother has another apartment to get away from Ellie, Justin and Tyler. What if she spends her nights in another place because the apartment reminds her too much of her ex? What if Ellie, Justin and Tyler reminded her too much of their father?

It kills Ellie knowing that her mother isn't even trying to reach out with them. It hurts knowing that her mother doesn't care enough to come back home to see her or her brothers.

Her friends know about her parents divorce but never mention it unless Ellie gives them the hint that it's okay. Anthony and Aaron both know that her parents and their divorce is a touchy subject and Ellie hates talking about it. It hurts her too much to talk about it.

Farkle noticed the absence of Ellie's parents at the apartment whenever he came over, but never mentioned it. He understood that Ellie didn't want to talk about it. He knew enough to wait for Ellie to come talk to him.

Through her parents divorce, Ellie learned that people leave. They make promises that they can't keep and they leave. She can try and reach out to them, but she knows that once they start distancing themselves from her, there's no point. Whatever relationship she had with them is damaged beyond repair.

Ellie looked around her bedroom, wondering where it all go wrong. She thought that family will always be there. Family is supposed to be a place where she can find her safe haven, a place where she can call home. She thought that family was supposed to be there when it all goes bad, but instead, it's where she found her deepest heartache. It's place where she feels out of place.

The one place she thought she would find love and comfort was the place where she found the most pain. Her dad was out of the picture, her mother is rarely ever at home. Now, all that is left are her brothers.

A tear began to stream down Ellie's face. Her bedroom is a reminder of everything she lost. The pictures in the frames were reminders of the life she once had.

The girl in the pictures isn't the same person anymore. Ellie looks back at all of those pictures and wonders where it all went wrong.

"El?" Anna said from the other end of the door.

"Yeah?" Ellie said, quickly wiping away her tears.

"Can I come in?" Anna asked.

"Yeah, you can," Ellie said, quickly composing herself.

She forced a smile on her face.

"Are you okay?" Anna asked, entering the bedroom.

"Yeah, I'm okay," Ellie answered.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah," Ellie nodded.

"Dinner is ready."

"Oh."

"Do you want me to bring up to you?"

"No, it's fine, I'll come down," Ellie said, standing up from her bed.

Anna stared at Ellie for a moment, knowing that something is up. Anna watched Ellie grow up and knows when something is up. She knows when Ellie is hurting, but knows to keep her distance. She knows not to do or say anything until Ellie says something.

***

Ellie spent most of the night in her bedroom, scrolling through pictures on her phone.

She used to be so happy. Where did it go wrong? When did her parents relationship end?

Looking back at all the pictures, Ellie began to notice the difference in her family. She noticed the shift in her family. The beginning of the previous year, everything was fine. They were all happy, but by spring, things fell apart. That's when her parents arguments began to get worse and worse. She remembers her mother accusing her father of cheating. She remembers her father accusing her mother of possibly hooking up with her boss.

Who's right, who's wrong, Ellie doesn't know. All she knows is that both of her parents messed up. She knows that both of her parents did something to ruin their relationship.

All Ellie remembers from last year was a home that was broken. A home where she was no longer happy. Ellie wished she was in Justin's shoes. She wished was turning eighteen soon and leave.

Ellie knew that once she graduates she's never coming back home again. She knows that she will see her brothers, Anna and William again, but once she's eighteen she's done. She's never coming to a home that only filled with misery and heartache.