one year. twelve months can change everything in your life. follow Demi and Nick through years of their relationship that will either make them or break them.
It's a little after 6pm when Nick makes her way through the front door carrying a bag containing some chocolate berry torte. Immediately he's greeted by the sound of his son screaming and his fiancée sobbing.
'Demi? What's wrong?' He asks rushing into the living room where Demi is standing in the middle of the floor with tears streaming down her cheeks as she holds a sobbing Toby.
'Take him.' She mumbles pushing Toby into his arms.
'Dems, come here...' He says softly as he cradles Toby against his chest and Demi backs away from them both.
'I-I can't.' She replies shaking her head as she quickly leaves the room and makes her way upstairs leaving Nick alone with the baby.
****
'Where is he?' Demi asks as Nick makes his way into the bedroom.
'Downstairs, sleeping.' He replies.
'I spoke to my therapist today.' Demi says quietly as she sits cross-legged on the bed.
'Yeah?' Nick asks and she takes a deep breath.
'She... She thinks I've got postpartum depression, Nick.' Demi admits as Nick sits down next to her.
'Yeah? And what do you think?' He asks softly.
'I think she might be right. It means everything I've been feeling actually make sense.' She replies.
'And how have you been feeling?' He asks draping his arm around her shoulders.
'Anxious. Sometimes he cries and I have no idea what to do. Sometimes I could easily just walk out the front door and never come back. Some days you go to work and I just sit and cry because the thought of being alone with him terrifies me.' She admits as he pulls her closer to him.
'Oh, Demi. Why didn't you say anything?' He asks and she shrugs her shoulders.
'I always read stories about people with PPD not loving their babies but that's not how I feel. I do love him. I love him so much but I don't know how to be a mom to him.' She replies, tears streaming down her cheeks as she stares down at the covers on the bed.
'I'm so sorry I didn't realise you were going through this.' He says and she shakes your head.
'You weren't to know.' She replies.
'What did your therapist suggest?' He asks as she cuddles into his side.
'More therapy. Possibly antidepressants but she doesn't want to go down that route just yet.' She replies.
'Okay. We'll get through this, Dems. It might be hard but you've been through tough things in the past.' He says and she nods her head.
'I know.' She replies quietly.
_______
'I've cancelled any commitments I had for the next week.' Nick says making his way into the living room cradling Toby against his chest.
'Thank you... Can I?' She asks quietly gesturing to the baby and he nods his head.
'Of course.' He replies smiling. Passing Toby over he watches as she leans back against the sofa with Toby lying on her knees.
'You know, I knew that this wasn't going to be easy but I just didn't think it would be so hard. I watch you with him and you're so good with him, he adores you Nick and I just want that as well... I want that bond you have with him.' She admits.
'He adores you as well, Demi. Look at the way he is looking at you; he absolutely adores you. You're his mommy and nothing is going to change that.' He says.
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'What if this never changes? What if I never work out how to deal with him?' She asks quietly.
'You will. This isn't going to last forever. You're getting the help that you need and taking that big step is absolutely amazing. I am so proud of you!' He replies kissing the top of her head.
'I love you.' She says softly.
'I love you more.' He replies.
I'm sorry this is so short! Next chapter up shortly.
