A Garden Unseen

Why does the world exist, Miss?

You know how some people like to tell other people that they are living a wonderful life, far from what they are really experiencing? 

Is that what most people call as living normally? 

Well, if that's the case then I am normal.

I sure am. I think.

I mean, I am named as holy as my parents want me to be. Mercy. Fucking Mercy.

Truth be told, I've only ever given at least 50 fucks in my twelve years of living in this rotten world.

And even then, most of those fucks were fucks that I didn't really have a choice with. Seriously, that's how life works.

You could say that it's pretty ironic that life gave me such a religious family, that would bless me with such a ridiculous name that I find it so hard that I am still here, living, breathing, whatever. Because you know what? Aside from the superficial smile that I perfected when I was in grade 5, there's really nothing else that can connect my personality to my stupid name.

Mercy, oh God, oh God have mercy. 

Why must I be named as something so, good? 

I don't even have friends to be good with.

Most of my social life includes my parents, a set of religious items that I need to talk to at exactly ten o'clock in the evening, and of course, my lovely little mirror that has been my only true social companion that talks to me on a level that can pretty much understand everything that I say. You know...reflections and shit.

Most of my days are spent on long walks by the beach in front of our house. 

Though there is not much to travel. I am strictly forbidden by my ever loving parents to cross over what we call as, "The Devil's border". I don't get it though. It's just some weirdly shaped fence that our neighbors from across made to keep out other residents from coming to their gloomy home that doesn't really look, homey.

Or it could be the fact that we never really see them go to church when it's praise day.

God. I wish I could be with them instead.

The praising is really taking a toll on me already. For real, twelve bloody years of torment! 

If this isn't hell then I don't know what the fuck is!

One bloody morning, I felt a sudden surge of excitement run through my veins. I don't know why. Maybe it's because I'm in my early prepubescent years already. 

I just, I don't know. I felt ecstatic. 

And damn it! It's a lucky day for me! My parents were nowhere to be found.

I guess they had some business to attend to.

So there I go, I sprung away from home in a heartbeat. I swear I didn't even think of putting on my pants because it doesn't matter anymore! 

I'm free!

At last, I'm free!

But of course, euphoria is nothing but madness covered by flowery bullshits that seeks to obliterate what we all cling on to when the end is nigh, hope. 

I had hoped that I could be free. 

I had hoped that I could escape the fiery chains of life called, bullshit.