The Humanity Formula

Hanbin, Hayi, and Happily-Ever-After

Epilogue.

Kim Hanbin. 21 years old. Recently single.

Heart ripped out by best friend I've been pining after since forever. Trying to get my life back together again.

Trying is the operative word here.

"Are you sure you have everything?" Professor Choi's asking like I'm a little kid, but I've never been outside of the country before. That was always her thing.

"Yeah, I got it." I try not to roll my eyes, since she was doing the best she could. At least she was trying to take responsibility. Since it was all her fault, anyway.

No, that's not true.

Hayi.

It was Hayi's fault.

And my fault.

Mostly my fault.

That Hayi couldn't love me the way I wanted.

That I couldn't let Hayi love me the way she needed.

"Sir?"

"Ah, sorry." I shove my passport and boarding pass out, twiddling with my fingers against the suitcase. I didn't even have a suitcase, Professor Choi ended up insisting she'd buy me one.

The mystique of travel is lost on me as I roll my suitcase into the security line. I try to focus on the other people travelling alone, not on the couples. I try not to wonder if the people travelling alone are going to meet a loved one. I want to think they're like me. Unhappy. Unattached.

Going through the motions.

Shoes off, shoes on.

Hands up, hands down.

Clear.

I sigh, looking at the boarding pass again to confirm my gate. Professor Choi texts me again, making sure I've gotten through security.

I find a chair away from other people, setting my suitcase in front of me. I stick my headphones in my ears, trying to find a playlist that doesn't bum me out. Somehow, everything finds a way to remind me of her. I suck in a deep breath, not wanting to get lost in my thoughts again.

When I see her, I'm not sure if it's my mind fucking with me again. That's the whole reason I'm boarding a plane to London: because I see her everywhere. On the bus, at school, in class. She was everywhere and I couldn't take it anymore.

But she's looking back at me.

She's looking at me and I don't think it's just in my head.

All I can do is look at her, eyes wide and mouth gaping like an idiot.

And I'm now I'm smiling, because I hate her.

I hate her so much for everything she's put me through.

"I'm so sorry, Hanbin. I lied..."

I hate her.

But not really.

I never could.

So I smile, and she starts to laugh.

"Why are you here?"

...

It's not fate that she's sitting beside me, I know that. There are other students from our university on the flight as well.