"Thank you, that was really nice of you to say that."
"I meant every word I said. I think your appearance is alluring to every man here. I believe that your eyes dazzle the happier you get, which you always are. Your smile can brighten anyone's day up, especially me. I mean, that's just how I feel."
Woah.
We lock eyes and suddenly the rest of the world has disappeared and it's only us. I move closer with my mouth agape and he reciprocates my action. Suddenly we are so close our breathing gets slower and slower and out hearts beat together. Still being stunned, he is the one that leans in closer and closer until the space between us is nonexistent.
Or that's at least what I wished would've happened. But here's the truth of what actually happened.
I walk into my classroom on Monday the 23rd of January, expecting my morning to go into routine. My ancient geyser of a Latin teacher begins to howl about the noise level and lack of participation, per usual. I am greeted by 10 of my best friends who just like to hang out here during homeroom, even though only four of us actually take the class. As the bell rings, all but four of us scatter to class with the rest of us opening our books to read ARCHNAE, once again. But with all of us sitting one behind the other, there is an absolute guarantee that there will be chaos. But, interrupting the repetitive routine, my Latin teacher hands out an unfamiliar slip. It's decorated in hearts and cupids and as if on cue, the entire class sighs. I didn't realize it was time for our Valentine's Single Matchmaker. Our teacher booms about how important this is to our school funds and how it's " fun for the single people" but most importantly, mandatory. I laugh at how ridiculous these questions are, like what my ideal height for a partner is, what hair color I prefer, and all the other superficial questions. Mark, one of my best friends since sophomore year, turns around and exclaims how question 32 is just insane.
"How am I supposed to decide whether I want my potential partner to have watched 90210 or Friends"? He sighs and reluctantly puts down Friends.
"How am I supposed to know how other people view me? 'What do other people first think about when they see me? 'How do I know?"
I was not expecting an answer to this.
"Well.... I mean the thing I notice is your smile.... Uh yeah Either your smile or your eyes." attached with an awkward hair scratch to avoid eye contact. Suddenly my cheeks are flushed. I can't help but avoid his caring and playful language towards everyone. His warm-heartedness and compassion towards his friends is just a part of his nature and that's what makes me so confused about him. Being the hormonal 16-year-old I am I don't usually pay attention to my feelings towards compliments from guys, but I can't help but hope there isn't a different totally unexpected outcome. I hold my breath, carry my hopes and say,
"Thank you, that was really nice of you to say that."
Hold your breath, hold your hopes
"No problem."
And just like that, it's all gone.
