This Is How I Disappear

Chapter 1: Terrible Things (Part 2)

*Quinton's Pov*

I sat in an old ruined church that j had discovered days after Alexander had left. I was always gping on walks to clear ny mind. I pulled out my cell phone and dialed Xander's number, maybe he wojld answer. It was instantly sent to the recorded message that told me that the number had been disconnected. I groaned and ended the call shoving my cell back into my pocket.

I was really upset ever since he left..sure he promised he would come back, but that doesn't mean it'll be any time soon. It was almost like I needed to see him. He left nothing behind except that drawing. I needed him instead of a stupid picture. I laud back in the snow. Maybe the snow would freeze me to death. Or maybe create a wormhole that would transport me to Xander.

His last words would be in my mjnd the whole time. They would be burned into my memory until I saw him agin. IF I saw him again. I also hoped he would keep his promises that he made to me. But maybe he wouldn't. My phone buzzed.

"Hello?" I said answering, I didn't recognize the number, but I always answered.

"Quinton? This is Lucas' mom." The persin said. It was Summer.

"Oh, hey. What's up?" I asked awkwardly, my voice didn't even sound like mine. I haven't talked much imsince he left.

"Do you know where Lucas is?" Sunmer asked, there was a worried tone in her voice.

"Doesn't he have his phone on him?" I asked, the boy wouldn't go anywhere wuthout his phone.

"No, I don't think so. If he does, hes not answering, or its dead." Sunmer answered. "Luna came by to see how he was, I guess he left school early, but he never came home."

"He might be at Zeke's." I said, that's where wr all wrnt when we wanted an escape.

"I told him to stop going there. It'll make him depressed." Summer said.

"He's probably fine." I told her.

"Well I need to talk to him. Its about Xander." Summer said.

"Did you talk to Xander?" I asked a little interested.

"No. But we got a letter from him." Summer answered.

"Is he okay?" I asked.

"How about you go find Lucas and bring him hone. Then I will tell you." Sunmer said.

"Okag. We'll be there soon I guess." I said getting up. Snow had melted through my clothes making me shiver.

"Seeya soon. Bye." Summer said and hang up before I said anything. I put my phone awag and started walking in the direction of Zeke's apartment. Maybe the news is bad.. maybe jts a suicide letter and hes already dead. I finally got to the apartment and knocked on the door. Zeke answered.

"Yo, whaddup?" Zeke asked as I stepped in.

"Lu here?" I asked.

"Yea. He's sleeping in Xan-the guest room." Zeke said, I could hear in his tone how much he missed Xander.

"Can you go wake him up? Xander sent Summer a letter, and she wants us both there." I explained.

"Yea I will wake hin up. Make yoursekf some coffee or hot chocolate." Zeke said walking away. I made myself a cup of coffee.

"I'm ready." Lucas said walking into the room, his voice was slurred wuth sleep.

"I'm fucking comin'." Zeke said holding up his car keys. I nodded.. I feel weird invitung randon people to a house that wasn't even mine.

"Okay." Lucas said, he stumbled out to Zeke's truck. If no one knew he just woke up they'd think he was drunk. We piled into the three seated truck and Lucas leaned his head on my shoulder. Zeke started the truck and the CD player played The Used quietly. Zeke like, idolized the band. (The Used is fucking mindblowing)

"Why do yoy want to come?" Lucas asked Zeke.

"He lived with me, we were close ya know? So I wanna know." Zeke answered as he drove the truck down the road.

"Yea, thats understandable." Lucas said.

"Here." I said handing Lucas my cup of coffee. "Have a bit."

"Thanks." Lucas murmured takinf a couple sips. The caffiene hit him fast, his eyes opened wider and he was more awake. I took the cup back and finished it. When we got to Lucas' house I set the cup in the cupholder abd we went inside the house.

Summer sat in the kitchen with Greg, Carl, and Aggie. Aggie insisted that I call her Gram though.

"Wow the gangs all here." Carl said looking at us. We all sat at the kitchen table and looked at Summer.

"So what did the letter say?" Lucas asked.

"He said that he was in a town over, but got in sone trouble so he moved to another state. He said that he mught cone back when he's ready to. That he's already got a job and a roommate at his apartment. That he misses everyone and that he's sorry for hurting us all the way he had.

"He said that he will write a letter to everyone in a while." Summer said. "He said that even if we all want him back we need to let him go and that we should move on. And even if he never cones back, that we should always hate him for how ge hurt us, even if wr forgive him." Summer finished, she was wiping her tears from her eyes. I couldn't believe any of that.. he promised. "There's one more thing. It says he might not get out of this battle alive, and that he apologizes to Quinton Lucas and Zeke."

"I want to find him." Lucas saud quietly, his voice was so much different than Xander's. His was full of emotuon, but Xander's was always like a rock.

"Lucas if you so much as even try, I will staple you to a wall." Summer said. "If any of you try." She added glancing at Zeke and me.

"What if he dies?" Zeke asked sharply, he was actually pretty close wuth Xander.. I mean, they did live together

"He will NOT die." Summer said sternly.

"This is all his fault." Lucas said coldly, he was string at Greg.

"Don't say things you don't mean." Summer said.

"Oh, I mean it!" Lucas snapped.

"I didn't do anything." Greg said in defense.

"Yeah right! Didn't do anything my ass." Lucas snarled. "You abused him because he was Gay!"

"I did not!" Greg shouted.

"We all know yoy did." I said dully, my voice had a flat tone. "Why do yiu think he started drugs and mived? Because of you. He became so dependent of them thay he needed them in order to function. And now he's gone. The starting line pounts to you." I said.

"He is a Faggot!" Greg said.

"What's wrong with being Gay?" I asked. Summer stared at me nervously as if I were a wild anumal.

"Everything." Greg said.

"Well fuck you! You practically killed your son. He has scars to prove it! And guess ehat?! I love Alexander." I spat venomously.

"And you're a disgusting Faggot." Greg said standiing up. I stood up almost about to attack Greg, nut Lucas pulled me down. Greg walked and left the house wuth a slam of the door.

"Sorry." I muttered looking down at my hands in my lap. I hid my face from them.

"I don't even know why he bothered sitting down wuth us. He's never given a damn about Xander." Summer said. I glanced at her. "I'm happy you stood up againdt him, Quinton." She told me. I nodded slowly.

"Summer, why didn't yoy tell us that he has hurt Alexander?" Gram asked. I thought that was a good question, why didn't she?

"Because I never thought it'd drive him into leaving." Summer answered.

"Well he's gone now." Lucas mumbled.

"And its fuckin terrible." Zeke said loudly, his voice was cracking. He was near tears. Yet I've never seen him cry. And I still wont. This was a terrible thing really.

~~~

A/N: thankies for reading. Please conment and tell me whatcha think :) -Gerard