Breathe Again

04: Gosh The Anticipation

Conversation of lunch is practically non-existent. Neither boy is particularly hungry, both full of nerves. They're at a generic fast food chain, a meal deal between the two of them – Liam always complains that the fries are too salty, Isaac always complains that the burgers are too greasy.

It's a perfect match really.

But it doesn't make the conversation any better, Isaac sifts his fries around in the other half of the burger box looking for the most appetizing looking one. Liam looks up at him with a mouthful of burger.

"I'm sorry," he says, except it comes out as a stream of one word, fighting it's way out around a mouthful of food.

"What for?"

"Dragging you out here."

For a moment Isaac had pretty much forgotten how they got here, had almost thought this was just a nice day out. It's easy to forget the late night drive and the drunken vague directions, the only reminder being the desperate desire to sleep that Isaac feels. It's easy to forget that they're about to crash Liam's estranged father wedding, the secrets that are bound to come out, the only reminder being the bags gathered by the leg of Isaac's chair.

But it was very easy to forget.

"It's okay," Isaac assures Liam, taking in the dark circles and the worried glances, "you know you don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"What? Make you drive all the way here and then ask you to turn around?"

"If that's what you want," Isaac says.

A fond smile takes over Liam's features.

"My hero," Liam replies, "but come on, I've bought a suit now, can't let that money go to waste. I'm going to turn up looking fabulous and hopefully he'll realise he left an amazing child behind and regret everything. Then he'll pay for us to go on a holiday to reunite and I will get a fantastic tan."

Liam's tone is light hearted and there's a smile on his face, but it's bitter and Isaac is worried. He knows Liam is joking, knows that deep down Liam expects absolutely nothing to change, knows that his father isn't worth his time. But Isaac can still see hints of six year old Liam, who wants nothing but his father's approval, who still believes that with enough perseverance his father just might come back.

Isaac really doesn't want Liam to go to this wedding. He really doesn't want Liam to get hurt.

But he's a good friend, and he's agreed to go, and he can't tell Liam not to. Isaac has to put himself into Liam's shoes, and then he has to be prepared to be there for Liam if everything falls to pieces.

"Liam," Isaac says, "you know if at any points you want to leave then just say the word, I'll whisk you away and we'll go get ice cream or something."

"Wow you really are my knight in shining armour, except usually they have a white steed as opposed to, you know, a Toyota from 2008. But I'll be fine, I promise."

"I'll have you know that Alan is in perfect condition."

"Alan?"

"My car Liam, god, it's like you don't even know me," Isaac sighs.

"You named your car Alan? It's a good job you're not riding in to save me on a horse, you'd probably call it Dave or something."

Isaac simply rolls his eyes in response.

"So ungrateful."

"I'm just saying."

"All you do is insult me."