Painting out my feelings.

No matter what.

They loved each other, this kind of love that comes up laid down on a tray of gold, where's everything is perfect and pink. This kind of love that was typically untypical, maybe even
too perfect to be real.
Till one day when somehow a strike stroke down the golden tray, burned it out into ashes, burning his love to her, and bringing his pride up so high, so that he wouldn't even stand up with her, when her dad leaves this world forever.
Now, she has turned down into down blues, broken hearted, with a lost mind, with no track of how she would go on with her life, her dad has left her on her own, and even the man she loved, turned his back on her, on her deadliest moment ever.
"Could it get any worse?" thats what she always thought, until the day she saw him walking down the street with his new love, her heart ached.
Her breathe got heavier, it felt like death has conquered her beating heart, she promised herself not to drop a tear over him, but whatsoever, promises were made to be broken.
All she could do, is go back, slam doors around her heart, and cry herself out on her bed, while her blankets held her, as it was the only thing left.
Waking up the next, knowing that she has nothing else up upon her hands, other than wishing her beloved one, all of the best, even it was like burning flames running in her body. It was the most selfless version she can  ever be. She just wanted him happy, even it ruins her blood, and dries her eyes.
Like a mother checking up her baby, she would ask his friends if he is doing fine, it somehow calmed her raging heart, raging for his love, his touch, his voice again.
Till one day, asking his friends couldn't be enough anymore, the flames of missing him, the urge of talking was, stronger than her wise mind. Casually opening his messages, checking up that it has been already a whole season since they have typed their last dead words, probably the day right before her dad leaving.
As the words got written, her teardrops blurred out the screen, but she sent it anyway, hoping it would just crash her fragile heart again.
Minutes after the text, her mind won't stop blaming her, she blocked him, without even giving him a chance to reply.
As the resistance gets low, urge gets high, and the blocking barrier goes down, she texts him again, with no blocking this time, and he replies.
He is sorry for every miserable month she had to spend because of him, he is sorry for it all.
  His named popped up in her recent chats, lately in her notifications.

        Hey, I don't even know what to call you anymore, but here I am, hoping I can call you babygirl, one more time, I know I messed it up a lot. Believe me, Karma has been doing it really good and tough to me.
I am here hoping, you could give me another chance.

This message made her hurt pump so hard, lighting up everywhere like fireworks, and like the kind hearted she is, she welcomed him, hugged him deep down her beautiful soul. Simply let him again into her life, he was shocked, she had him always wondering what kind of angelic heart does she own.
All she was doing was keeping a promise she said
      " I am gonna be here for you no
matter what."