Un-Tying the Knot {h.s.}

Chapter 59

"Mmm, indeed it is," he chuckles, wrapping both arms firmly around me this time, pulling me completely flush against him, his mouth leaning up to mine, meshing our lips together in an intense kiss, despite our potential morning breath.

None of that mattered right now.

I straddle him to make us a little more comfortable, groaning as I feel him deepen our kiss even more, our mutual arousals on display for each other as my hips unintentionally grind against his, the thin fabric between us hardly concealing anything.

After a few intense minutes of making out with hands starting to grope each other in more intimate ways, I finally pull away breathlessly, my hair fanning over his face playfully as I hover languidly over him. "I thought you didn't come here for sex," I whisper, voice charged heatedly.

He groans, letting his head fall back into the pillow with a grunt. "I didn't," he chuckles. "But it's kinda hard to ignore you in panties and sexy sleep hair, especially when you're grinding on me like that."

I wiggle my eyebrows, sitting up. "I can stop..."

He bit his bottom lip as my hands reach for the hem of my top, slowly pulling it up my torso, teasing him with a bit of a show — "Or, I can..." — but I stop just before I reach my bra-less chest.

He growls frustratedly, gripping my hips quickly and flipping us over, slotting his body seamlessly between my thighs. "Trust me, I want you to ride me until the cows come home..." he mumbles, nibbling on my ear as he grinds his arousal against my dampening panties a little harder. "But I promised myself honesty. Integrity. And an innocent morning with you...and I'm not going back on that..."

I groan, legs wrapping around his waist. "What if I want you to?"

He pulled back, looking down at me with a playful smile. "Then I'd say I've got you whipped, darlin.'"

I scoff at him, playfully hitting his shoulder, giggling when he leans down and kisses me sweetly.

"Now, if I'm not mistaken, I had breakfast in bed planned for you, beautiful. Stay here..." he whispers, leaning down to kiss my lips again before standing, pulling on his slacks before picking up his phone and walking to the kitchen.

Ugh, is he serious right now?

It was the most amazing morning I've ever had with a man. But — it left me confused. Beyond confused, really. He didn't tell me why he showed up, and he didn't even want sex. He just rolled in like a freight train, an emotional wrecking ball, only to leave the next day after spoon feeding me breakfast in bed from Postmates and treating me like a queen. His queen.

To what? Tell me that he needed me and that he was trying? That he was going to fix it, whatever it was, once and for all? But not right away?

Come on, Harold.

Something about those strong arms and teary eyes and that loving look that I knew was only for me, however, made me come around today. Despite my better efforts to logic myself out of my irrational anger, I couldn't seem to keep from being a little bit bitter. I know he can't give me any more than he already is, and I know that he's trying — but it doesn't stop the feeling that maybe what we have will never be anything more than what we are right now. I know this. But goddamnit, it doesn't stop me from thinking he's a fucking asshole for playing with my emotions like this.

I'd only come by because I knew the longer I waited, the harder it would be for us to act normal around each other. It wasn't that I missed him. It wasn't that the morning of just simply cuddling with him had made me feel some type of way, even more than normal.
No, of course not.