Cautiously he got out of Ant's embrace. He didn't want to wake his boyfriend, who desperately needed every hour of sleep he could get. The last few days got really stressful although they were still on a break. They never really got the chance to relax. They hadn't even managed to talk. To discuss what happened during that interview.
Dec knew how important that was though. It should finally eliminate all of his friend's left over doubts and fears. They didn't get any closer either. In the evenings they usually just fell into the bed, completely tired, managing nothing more than to cuddle up. As close as possible but still not close enough. How he would love to feel Ant that close again, but he didn't give in to that impulse, was happy with what he had. He knew that at some point, they'll do it again and at some point go even further. Who cared about a few more days? Only that Ant was with him counted.
With a smile on his face, Dec left the bedroom, and went to get the newspaper. Today the interview they did a few days ago would be printed. After making tea and toast for them, he opened the paper.
The interview, that ended so differently to how they expected it to go. Slightly panicky at times, fearing something might go wrong. Fearing Ant might lose himself even more in his worries. But that didn't happen. In the contrary. He openly confessed his love for Ant. Even if nobody would notice anything. They had always been to close for that. The most important thing was that Ant understood. That he would finally realised that he wasn't going anywhere. Not without him.
Dec shook his head smiling. They didn't even want to do that interview and now look what it did for them. Nothing but good. Finally, he found the right page. He read through it. Every word he said then, came from deep within. He loved Ant and he'd prove it to him over and over again. No matter in what way.
***
Waking up, Antfelt that Dec wasn't in bed with him anymore.
He got up and tried to decide if he should have a shower first or go and find Dec. The wish to see his little one was stronger and maybe he could convince him to share a bath with him. Would be the best way to start the day anyway. On top of it he missed the closeness he shared with Dec. The feeling of skin on skin. The smell and those small noises he already got a little taste of. He wanted Dec as close again as in that hotel after their tour.
Dressed only in shorts he left the bedroom and made his way straight to the kitchen. He knew that he would find him there. In the door he stood still and watched Dec. Completely relaxed he sat there, seemingly far away in his thoughts.
It felt good to see Declan in such a relaxed state. And he felt guilty for being the reason that it hasn't been like this before. He had understood, after all. He knew, Dec wasn't going anywhere. But why was it so unbelievably difficult to admit that?
Maybe he should just make a step towards his boyfriend. Dec had clearly shown him how he felt and not only in that interview. His own stupid fears had taken control over him again and for a moment he thought that Dec had had enough but the total opposite happened. He had confessed his love for him publicly. What more could he want? Looking closer, he saw that Dec was reading the paper and when he moved a few steps closer he saw that it was some kind of survey. Cautiously he stood behind him and put his hand on his shoulder, as not to spook Dec. Immediately the smaller man leaned into the touch and Ant wrapped his arms around him, ignoring the backrest.
"Hey." He whispered into Declan's ear and pressed a slight kiss onto it.
"Hey." Dec answered and rubbed his cheek against Ant's. "Slept well?"
"Stopped. You weren't there anymore."
"Sorry but I couldn't stay in bed and I didn't want to wake you."
"That's okay... I just..."
"Hmm?"
"I missed you."
He knew that Dec was smiling.
Miissed you too." The smaller man answered and pulled him around for a kiss sp that Ant had no choice but to sit on Dec's lap.
"And now?"
"Breakfast? Or...?" Dec's eyes sparkled.
"Or what?"
"This..."
The next moment Dec had buried his hand in Ant's hair and pulled him in for another kiss. His other hand found its way to Ant's back, pressing them even closer together – all he wished for ever since he woke up.
It soon turned much more passionate and both were out of breath when they finally parted lips. The grin on Dec's face grew. Of course, he felt it too. The feeling of being that close to each other.
"What do you think..." Dec said, pressing another kiss onto his lips. "Breakfast and then we'll continue this in bed."
"Good idea, but I'd prefer the bathtub. Of course only if you want to..."
"Of course I do."
Ant just wanted to stand up again, when Dec held him back.
"Where are you going?"
"I thought we wanted..."
"We do, but who said I have to let go of you for that?"
They changed their position slightly so that Ant was able to sit on Dec's thigh and lean back on him. Strange, not overly comfortable and surely not the best way to eat breakfast but he couldn't care less right now.
For a while they enjoyed their breakfast in total silence until Ant's eyes caught the title of the article Dec read when he entered the kitchen.
"Have you been fascinated by this the whole morning?"
"Somehow yes."
"Hmm..."
Ant read it properly - "Five things how you know he wants to be with you!" - and shook his head.
"No kidding!"
"Why? I found the answers Interesting – and most of all really fitting."
"Really? Let me see then." Ant grabbed the newspaper.
"Firstly, he looks at you a lot." He turned his head and looked straight into Dec's eyes. "True. I can't remember anyone who ever looked at me as often and intensive as you do."
"You see? Point one goes to me."
"Secondly, he often leans in to you." When Ant read that the hold around his waist got stronger and Dec said, "I'd say that point goes to you. As often as you search the closeness,the physical contact..."
"Thirdly, he begins to twitch at his clothes." Again Ant's gaze went to Dec.
"And I always thought that was because you're nervous. That you might not really feel comfortable." Dec tensed up slightly upon hearing that.
"A little bit – especially in Interviews. The worst was when we were alone together... but that was because I was afraid of doing something wrong."
"You couldn't do anything wrong, Decky. And it's without a doubt me who twitches at his clothes all the time.
„Maybe, but I play with my ring totally unfocussed on reality just as often."
„Then we're equal in this point." Ant smiled and pressed a kiss onto Dec's lips.
„Fourthly, when he's close to you and says something funny, he looks at you when everybody's laughing to see if you do too."
"Oh yes. Point four definitely is true as well. But I guess we're both the same here too."
"Yeah, and it's good the way it is. It just fits."
"Fifthly, he winks at you in a fitting situation." Ant put the paper away, thinking about that last point.
"Hmm..."
"What?"
"I can't remember you winking at me explicitly." Ant said quietly.
"Maybe there just hasn't been a fitting situation yet."
"Could be... and now?"
„Now what?" Dec's voice nothing but a whisper.
„Is it fitting now?"
„You tell me..."
Ant freed himself from Dec's arms and got up, takinh his hand.
„Come on." Ant whispered, waiting for Dec to look at him.
"What? Where?"
"Ticking off point six of the list."
"Point six?"
"He wants to have a bath with you."
The instant he said that sentence he gave Dec a wink of the eye. Immediately he recognised the spark in his eyes. Ant knew that Dec understood, that he had finally given back what Dec had hoped for the whole time.
Seconds later he found himself in a tight hug, getting showered with kisses.
