Trails of a Psychopath (A Criminal Minds Fanfic)

New Feelings Submerge

Chapter Twenty-Five

~Rachel's POV~

We had finally left the hospital around 9:30 p.m., it was an extensive checkout. They wanted to make sure I was stable enough to leave, mentally and physically. My memory was starting to regain itself, but I knew some spots would just be gone forever. I was okay with that.
   Now it was time for the club. Reid and I wasn't too excited about it, but sucked it up and kept our mouths shut. It was kind of a surreal feeling, all of this. The war was finally over. I could go out in public now, without any fear of my father. I could finally have fun.
   Penelope drove me to her house, J.J and Charlotte sitting in the back. They all chatted amongst themselves, Charlotte attempting to as best as she could. I managed to follow their conversations, mostly getting lost in thought or completely ignoring them.

"Alright, let's start looking all hot and stuff, shall we!?" Penelope squealed, snapping me back into the real world.

   I smiled tensely and nodded as I helped Charlotte climb out. She jumped into my arms and I carried her into Penelope's house. It wasn't as big as Reid's, but still pretty roomy in comparison. There were bright pink walls scattered with pictures of rock bands and guy models.
   She had fluffy pillows and comfy couches in her livingroom. Her house smelled of fruit and lavender as she led us to her own room. It was just as worse. I was blinded by the many shades of pink that coated her room. Her bed was frilly lace and piled with small heart pillows.

"So, why don't we get started?" J.J asked, a smile growing on her face as she went to Penelope's closet.

   I shrugged and played with my hair, nervously looking around and letting Charlotte wander around the room. There were plenty of things to keep her occupied at the moment.

"Where are we going to keep Charlotte? We cant just leave her here."

   My voice became higher from stress and my hands started to shake. J.J gave me a warm smile and nodded her head. I had lost three whole days without her, could I really leave her all night?

"She is going to have a little sleepover my son, if that's okay?"

   I breathed a sigh of relief and nodded, seeing Charlotte smile warily at the thought of meeting another boy her age. J.J combed through Penelope's closet, trying to find something for me to wear.

"Look deeper, nothing in the front will fit that tiny body of hers! My bust and butt is way too big."

   I chuckled awkwardly and kicked the rug under my feet. After a few more minutes, J.J finally whipped something out. She had an excited grin on her face as she showed it off to us. It was a simple black leather crop jacket with a white V-neck t-shirt and jeans to match.

"Simple and classy, yet sexy and edgy. What do you think, Garcia?" J.J asked, winking at me and giggling like a little girl.

"Oh! I totally forgot about those clothes one of my friends gave me. She thought it would actually fit me, ha! I'm too voluminous for it. I think it'll look great on you, Rachel."

   Penelope gave her a round of applause and J.J thrust the clothes in my arms. I quietly made my way to the bathroom. I turned around to convince them out of this, but Penelope beat me to it.

"No! Go in that bathroom, change into those things, and come out looking sexy! Now!" She ordered, mockingly glaring at me and pointing her finger into the bathroom.

   The other girls laughed at her and I turned around and did the walk of shame into the doorway. I shut the door and locked it just in case. I leaned against it and let out a sigh. I slipped off my clothes and stepped into the jeans first. My legs were still decently weak and sore at that.
    I took a deep breath, my hands shaking again. I was struggling to pull the jeans all the way up my legs, my eyes trailing along the puffy scars scattered along my skin. I took another shaky breath, averting my eyes and finally able to zip and button them up.
   My head started pounding and I groaned as I squeezed the bridge of my nose. I started to feel dizzy and had to hold the kitchen sink for balance. The doctor said that I would have trouble for at least a month or two with the overdose, I was beginning to feel the after affects of withdrawals.
   They also said my PTSD could act up and be triggered very easily for awhile. Maybe going out to a place with strangers and loud noises wasn't a good idea. I ignored the stabbing pain and pulled on the T-shirt and jacket before looking in the mirror.
   I frowned and touched the cool glass with my fingers. My hair was still messy and uneven, it looked awful. I could see the scars on the skin that was still exposed. Ugly. I covered my wrist with my fingers, shivering at the thoughts.