Sex Therapy

Say GoodBye

Keith stood up backing away slowly, shaking his head in disbelief, "So lying and cheating is better?"

He wailed holding his chest. It felt like he was sitting in a bed of sharp pins as he bled out his cares profusely.

Kaya nodded, as she crossed her, "My sophomore year of college I was diagnosed and once my ovaries were removed I knew that no man who wanted children would ever want me. Then I met you and we started dating and you told me that no matter how much you loved me that was your dealbreaker, and I loved you to so I lied and used my anxiety disorder as an excuse to why we would never have sex because eventually you would figure it out" she confessed.

Keith's mind was blown, he had so many questions, and none of them made sense at the moment.

"I made a mistake and I'll be paying for it the rest of my life. I was in such a dark place when I met you, and you showed so much love. I couldn't bare to tell you the truth." Kaya confessed.

Kaya cried for the scared little girl whose life was beautiful and simple before all this.

She cried for the intense pain she still felt today, and the way she had spent everyday wishing her body matched her mind. She hid her scares well, but love seemed to hurt the most.

Keith hugged her, his huge strong arms passionately crushed her frail body as their tears meshed into one, "I would have still been right here K, that's not an excuse for what you did" he sighed.

Kaya pushed him away grabbing a vase near the window and then she threw it against the floor watching it break.

"I can't have kids!" Kaya screamed emotionally.

The glass exploded with a big, "bang!" and the crystal pieces fell to the floor.

Kaya pointed, "Don't you get it? I am broken. I have always been. You are experiencing heartbreak for the first time. Do you know how many times I've loved?

Do you know how hard it was being in relationship after relationship, and every partner walking out when I told them, my truth? It's been pure hell...you have no idea.

Kaya was spinning in her own cycles of madness reliving all of her deep rejections again and again.

Her hands trembled as she cupped Keith's face, "then you came along, and for the first time I believed in every little girl's fairytale. I believed for a second that I was worth love. I couldn't let you go, you were too good of a high. So when you asked me to marry you, I said yes."

I lied to you because I will never be good enough for you" Kaya broke down, "I lied because you were the only person that gave me a reason to breathe, exist, and have a purpose.

Kaya peered into Keith's watery eyes, "tell me the truth would you have married me if I told you my secret?" she asked firmly.

Keith took a deep breath, "no" he whispered.

Then the world ended with a bang that was more like a sad whimper.

Kaya stumbled back feeling the pain of his debris, as the truth came out like cannons and gunpowder.

She nodded looking up quietly at the ceiling trying to catch the tears, " I knew that I was being selfish but I loved you. Then we moved too fast, and I couldn't look back. I had to commit to the live and I figured that eventually if I married you you would change your mind about wanting kids.

Keith cornered Kaya grabbing her angrily, "I would have taken that stupid! I never planned to marry anyone after you. DON'T YOU KNOW THAT'S HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU? If you had cancer than I would be your chemo. If you were dying then I would want to be the earth you lay on when it's all over. Don't you understand? that I would be your fears, or whatever is closest to you,...just to spend forever with you! " his voice boomed as disappointment cracked the ridges of his heart.