Sina Saves

25. Love and Warmth

"I'll never let you go if you don't want me to." I heard my heartbeat in my ears. Blood rushed through me and roared in my ears. Do you have any idea what that means to me? Do you have a single clue? How are you doing this to me? Gods, I love you.

I put my arm over his and laid my fingers across his. I wanted to tell him to never let me go, but in reality, he'd have to. Dad said we probably wouldn't be able to take them back right away. I loved him and that was the end of it. That meant I had to be willing to hurt myself to save him. Why????

I closed my eyes and exhaled slowly. "We're going to be okay aren't we?"

"You and me are going to be okay. I know it." I felt all tingly.

We were at Wall Maria now. We stopped for a few minutes. Will ran over to me. He started looking me over. Nico ran over. "You're okay?"

"Of course." I looked over to Armin. Will had a smirk. Nico was trying to look both like I-ship-it and I'll-break-you-if-you-hurt-her. Once Will was done checking me over, he hugged me and went around to other people. Nico talked to me for a while. He was sleepy and sat down after a bit. Will sat down next to him, and they leaned over each other. I went over to Annie.

"I heard you got hurt."

"Yeah."

"Then your boyfriend took wonderful care of you." She smirked a little.

"Not my boyfriend but yeah."

"Your boyfriend."

"Does that mean he's your ex?" She looked at me angrily. "Fine whatever, Annie."

"Go talk with your boyfriend." She smirked a little again.

"Maybe I will." I turned on my heel dramatically and flipped my hair as I sashayed away. I slayed her like Queen Shane. I stopped after a few steps. Armin was looking at me. I went over to him. I didn't know what to say. I looked at his hair, his eyes, his nose, the lines and shadows of his face, and finally my eyes stopped at his lips. I suddenly wanted to kiss him. I couldn't though.

"Hi."

"Hi yourself." I became aware of how cold I was. I pulled my cloak around me tighter. Armin's eyes moved slowly around me. I desperately hoped he was doing the same thing as me. He lightly touched my hair. The purple was fading out, but he still looked at it with amusement. "Like it much?"

He didn't answer at first. He just twirled it a little and smiled. "Yeah." His voice was soft. He slowly moved his eyes up to mine. His eyes didn't show the same emotion as his face. They had a little bit of emptiness in them from past trauma. I knew the look well because I saw it every morning in the mirror.

I smiled at him. It wasn't forced. It felt natural. His eyes shined a little bit before he wrapped his arms around me. The way he held me didn't make me feel trapped. It felt warm and protective. His arms invited me to get closer, but there was no insistence. Warmth seeped into me like I had come in off the streets and received hot chocolate. I held my arms around his lower back and leaned on him a little. He held my upper and middle back. When I finally let go, he put a hand on my face. I felt myself flinch a little. "Sorry."

"It's not your fault." His voice had a note of melancholic truth. "No one's gonna hurt you ever again. I-I won't let them." He sounded diffident but sure.

"I know." The way his fingertips felt and fit against my cheek made me think like they were shaped to be together. His other arm was around my waist.

This is the part when, in a less fucked up world, we would've said I love you to each other and kissed. Unfortunately, my life was about as nice as New Orleans three days after mardi gras dumpster sludge. So pretty horrid. That's supposed to mean I'm gonna be some inspirational super famous person in the future though, right?

I felt my mind raging. Stupid wars behind my head and above my throat. I ignored it and did what I wanted. I looked into his eyes and felt myself smiling.

"I like it when you smile."

I laughed softly. "My smile likes you too."

He laughed a little. His eyes moved from emptiness to amusement and maybe even joy. I breathed in his smell of rosemary. "Sina, I-"

He was cut off by a loud whistle. It was Reyna. I told Armin I was sorry before joining her. Nico and Will pulled themselves up. Nico stalked while Will strolled. He poked Nico. Nico smiled faintly despite himself. Jason came up looking like the pontifex maximus he was. Percy and Annabeth came up together.

"We need to rework our strategy. Everything will be the same except Annabeth will be ready to protect anyone who needs it and Sina will stay with Levi. Nico will move towards the center to make up for her lost territory."

We nodded and left to ready ourselves.