Hot Potato: A Screwball Romantic Comedy Novella

Chapter 2

Brest, Poland –

        Susan Thornton eyed the men in high-ranking military uniforms standing around her.  She knew that she – in an expensive tailored silk shirt and matching pants – attracted them.  But she wanted to attract them with the missile launcher.

       She hefted it to her shoulder and said, “Please clear the back-blast area, gentlemen.  About 15 meters to the rear and 10 meters to the sides.”

       Watching the men scurry out of the way, she said, “Now note that the line-of-sight to the target is actually obscured by that clump of trees.”

       The men all looked downrange towards a tank hull peeking out from behind a grove of trees.  As they watched, the tank driver backed up the tank until it was totally obscured.  Then the tank driver scrambled out of the tank and dashed to a safe position.

       “Target medium tank – front!” she said.  “Identify!  Fire!  On the way!”

       Flame roared out of the launcher and a dot hurtled towards the target.  Susan turned her back on the target and removed the launcher from her shoulder.  She smiled, knowing how delighted the men would be at the result of her demonstration.

        The dot traveled downrange, popped up over the trees, then dove down behind the trees and hit the target with a bang and a flash of light.  

       Around her the uniformed men clapped and stamped their feet.  Susan gestured at the officer standing closest to her.

       “Now, General Crenski, you try it.”

      The general’s chest seemed to visually expand as he took the missile launcher Susan held out to him.  She smiled again.  Yes, this was going to be a good sales day.

***

Los Angeles

      Walter typed in a question on his phone and waited for the answer.  He clicked on the first link and scanned the information.

     “Bingo!” he said.

      “What’d you find out?” Charlie asked, coming over to Walter’s end of the counter.

      “Just listen.”

      Walter dialed a number and then, speaking with a Texas accent, said, “Swiss Federal Bank?  I want to speak to the international credit department.”

     Charlie said, “The Swiss are going to lend you money?”

     Walter waved his arm for Charlie to be quiet.

     “My name is James Witherspoon of International Continental Dynamics.  We have an account with your bank.”

     Walter listened to the reply, then said, “No, I won’t tell you the number over the phone.  Don’t you know what bank secrecy means?  Just check your computer – you’ll see we’re a major client.”

     When he got confirmation of the account, Walter went on, “We have a small problem.”

     He ignored Charlie hissing the word “Small?”

     “We shipped 30 of our plutonium isolators to the Russians six months ago.  We haven’t been paid and you guaranteed the loan.  When are we going to get our money?”

     Walter waved his arm to shush Charlie before he said anything else.

     “You haven’t been paid either,” Walter said.  “What are you doing about it?”