Hearing Her Melody

Chapter 6

I finally accepted it. I looked so stupid. And ugly. And horrible. And obese. And imperfect. I could go on and on. I had tried so much to be perfect. I had stopped eating completely. Stopped singing so they couldn't find any defect in me. I did all that. Just to escape all those remarks. To escape all the embarrassment.

I felt numb. Completely numb. There was no feeling at all. None. The phone just slipped out of my fingers and landed on the bed with a small thud. My eyes were focused on the window. The window of my room. That caused all this mess to happen. Ryder. The stupid bet. This video. Everything. 

Katie sat on the bed next to me.

"Are you okay?" She asked worriedly.

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure? Cause if you want to we can stay home with a huge tub of ice cream and watch Chickflicks all day."

"No. No need for that. I'm perfectly fine. Besides it's only going to stay for a week right? Won't do any harm. Besides Natalie's a bitch. She could never get to me."

Gosh, I was such a big liar.

Katie smiled and said, "That's my BFF. Strong and unaffected by any harsh and negative comments. Let's get ready for school shall we?"

I just gave her a weak smile in return.

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The moment I entered the school, people were staring at me and hushed whispers filled the hallways. Wherever I went. 

I silently made my way towards my locker which unfortunately  happened to be next to the famous Ryder fricking Matthews.

I felt his intent stare on me but didn't return it. Instead I bowed my head even lower than before. I opened my locker and took out my books for the the first class. While I was arranging my books, I felt a presence next to me. Ryder, of course.

"What do you want, Matthews?" I asked in annoyance.

I was burning with anger. It was because of him that all this stuff had happened. Him, the bet, my singing. Everything!

"So we're on last name basis I see?"  He replied with a smirk.

"Leave me alone, Ryder."

"Again back to first name basis. Make up your mind Ella."

I just ignored him. There was no use in arguing.

"Are you okay, Ella?" He asked with concern lacing his voice.

 Yeah, it's all fake.

I ignored him and slammed the locker door causing a loud bang to fill the hallway. People paused their conversation-most likely about me-and stared at me for a second then went back to their talking.

The bell rang and I was about to rush to class when Ryder gripped my wrist and I bumped into his chest. Students went to their classes and the hallway was empty in a few seconds.

"What the fuck do you want Ryder?" I practically screamed.

"Hey, no need to be rude. I just asked you if you're fine."

"Just leave me alone."

"No. Answer my question first."

Deep breaths Ella. Deep breaths.

"I'm fine."

"No you're not. You're lying."

Ok that's it. I'm done controlling myself.

I slappped Ryder on the face. He cupped his cheek with his hand and stared at me with surprise.

I just screamed at him.

"You want an answer honest answer Ryder?  Well, I'm NOT fine! Not fine at all! Why? Well, do you know how it feels when every single person on the fucking planet tells you that you're not perfect? When they tell you what a fat, ugly good for nothing blob. When they tell you are the result of such an imperfect family. A family whose father is dead and mother works all the time. Do you know how it feels when you starve yourself to death, just to stop all those hurtful and negative comments and those looks of disgust thrown at your way?"

Tears were streaming down my face now.

"To add it all up you heard me singing, the bet happened and then this! You took me to that fucking party! Then that stuff happened. The video on Facebook with people insulting me. Have you read all those comments Ryder? Did you do anything to defend me?! Did you? Now I'm viral on the internet and everyone's calling me such a mess! And you know what Ryder? It hurts. It hurts a lot. So much that sometimes I ask myself that why do I even exist? Why am I even telling you these things! It's not like you would care anyway. Nobody cares. So stop asking if I'm fine or not. Because I know it's all a show. All the concern you show me is fake. And you know what? Show my singing video to everyone! I don't even fucking care anymore! I'm already insulted too much, anyways."

With that I turned on my heel and left.

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Phewwww! That was long. 

So what do you think about Ella's outburst and confession. Poor girl. I literally cried while writing this.

Anyways guys I'll try to update as much as I can.

Until then............😏😏😏