Love, Secrets and War~

5. The Devil You Know

I see his chalky white face every time I close my eyes. It has been burnt on the back of my retinas, haunting me every time I try and go to sleep. Therefore, sleep has been eluding me. I haven't been able to grasp it fully since I saw Ian's dead body. Leaving me very grumpy, tired and frustrated.

Emily's tablet is on the table, opened up on a photograph. The photograph is of Ian's suicide note that she had the sense to take a picture of as most of us were freaking out. Written in an untidy scrawl is a confession, to Alison's murder.

"Is this a suicide note or a confession?" questions Aria. A crease has formed between her brow due to the fact she has been frowning at the screen for so long.

"It's both," Spencer replies a note of certainty in her voice.

"Emily, how do you have this?" Aria asks.

"I sent it to her," Hanna confesses. Oh, so it was Hanna that took the picture then. "I took the picture on my phone before we called the cops."

"Weird. Why would Ian kill himself just as he was about to skip town with Melissa?"

"Maybe he realized he was gonna get caught," I point out. They all turn and look at me. "I mean, he couldn't hide forever, even with Melissa and Wren's help."

Aria notices the name that I reluctantly tag at the end of my point. She raises a questioning brow and opens her bow lips to ask the question that I know has been on her mind for a while now. But before even a syllable could pass her lips someone else asked the question.

"Talking about Wren... you and he seemed close the other night," Hanna teases, "what is that about?"

Shit, she saw his arm around my waist. I suck in a deep breath and try to remain as composed as possible. "Nothing," I lie, "he just happened to see I was about to fall and caught me..."

"Bull," Spencer interrupts, "I know that you know each other better than that. He asked about you when I saw him at the hospital. Asked why you were dodging his calls."

Embarrassment floods through me as all for of them stare. Questions in all of their eyes. I feel my cheeks redden underneath their intense gazes. I bring my hands to my face to hide my shame.

"Oh shit. What happened between you guys?"

"I kind of...hadsexwithhimandlostmyvirginity," I mumble, the words coming out in an incoherent mess.

The others stare at me blankly, unable to process what I just said. Whilst Aria is slowly translating in her head, I can literally see the cogs turning in her mind. Realization dawns upon her. I watch as her face morphs from questioning to realization to embarrassment.

"You tried to tell me before, didn't you?" she exclaims.

"Yes."

"Can someone fill the rest of us in? The twin telepathy is really annoying," Emily complains, her gaze darting between us as her eyes filled with confusion.

Both of our cheeks flush, I am surprised that I am not the resembling a tomato right now. My tongue is tied, and I cannot form the words to tell others. Especially, Spencer, who has her own complications. I send Aria a pleading look.

"Translation: She had sex with him," Aria supplies.

I couldn't look Spencer in the eye.

"You lost your virginity?!" Hanna exclaims, louder than I would like. Several heads swivel in our direction, including the lacrosse team and Mike. The ground could have opened up right now and I would have been happy.

"Hanna!" Emily hisses.

"What?"

"I don't think that the entire school needed to know that she has lost her virginity," Emily points out, sympathy shining in her eyes.