Innocence and the Outlaw

Chapter Fourteen

Her father had made an appearance as well and let her know that she should be flattered that Benjamin was still willing to marry her despite the fact that she had allowed an Indian to bed her. Leah had wanted to get angry and shout at her father but her voice had been taken from her by her intense sobs.

"Leah..." Chance started but she shook her head and held up her hand.

"Please don't." she pleaded. "I've heard more lectures and advice today than I can handle. I can't stand to listen to one more word."

"Fair enough." Chance said with a nod as he went back to carving on the stick. "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry and I love you." Leah felt her resolve fail her and tears filled her eyes. Chance stood and hugged her tight, letting her cry against her chest.

"Are you getting ready to do what I think you are?" he asked softly and she nodded against his shirt. He kissed her hair as she pulled away from him and then Leah wrapped her arms tight around herself and stepped off the porch. It was a long walk up to lookout hill and it would be made longer by the dread she felt in every step.

***

Chase stood on a hill and looked out over the rolling plains. He heard an owl hooting in the distance as darkness began to fall and the sun sank beyond the horizon. Knowing what was coming yet waiting for it to happen tested every ounce of self control that Chase had to its limits.

Chase was going to leave. Better for Leah to be with Benjamin, a man who her family was ready to approve of, the first man she had given her heart to, and a man who the world would accept her being with than with him. Chance was an annoying, loud-mouthed jackass but he was also right. Chase had nothing to offer Leah other than his love and in a world like the one he lived in, a world where danger was everywhere and you risked death everyday, his love may prove to not be enough.

Leah was his life mate. She was the single best thing that had ever happened in his life and yet he knew he could not keep her. He loved her too much to make her make this choice. He loved her too much to take her into the unknown and risk her life. For the first time in his entire life, Chase was going to give up. He was going to let go and walk away.

He heard soft footsteps behind him and didn't have to turn to know it was Leah approaching him. He had memorized every sound she made. He knew her footsteps, her breathing, her sighs, her scents..... He squeezed his eyes closed against the burning wetness threatening to spill from them and swallowed hard.

"I'm leaving." he said gruffly as she came to stand beside him. Leah looked up at his tense face and saw the redness in his eyes, the tightness in his jaw.

"Are you going to let me speak?" she asked, though her voice was rough from all the tears she had cried. Chase just stood there with his arms folded, waiting for her to say what she wanted to say.

"This is the hardest thing I've ever done, Chase... I.. I love you so much." her voice broke and her tears were more than Chase could bear. He cleared his throat and sniffed loudly before walking around her and grabbing Blaze's reins.

"I'm leaving." he repeated, unable to come up with anything else to say that would help the situation.

"Please tell me what you're thinking." Leah begged. She wanted him to beg her to come with him. If he would just beg then she knew she could find the strength to ignore her parents, ignore Benjamin, ignore her conscience and go with him. But she knew deep down that Chase Caldwell was not a man that begged for anything.

"I am thinking that you are choosing another man over me." Chase ground out, though still he didn't look at her. Leah shook her head and put her hands on the bare skin of his back. She heard him hiss as if her touch pained him and he stiffened.