Another Sad Story

This

My eyes flutter open. I feel numb. I continue to stare at the bright blue letter of my alarm clock repeating in my head 'The world is not ending'. I get ready and head down stairs only to see my brother Logan waiting by the door and my father wasted of his ass, passed out on the couch. I walk out the door and straight into the car.

We pull into the school parking lot and park, as you my imagine. I exit the car, put in my headphones and walk to the main doors of the school. I walk down the halls, new words on all the posters: Support the real victims of suicide, Don't do something you'll regret, and my personal favorite Suicide is selfish. Ignoring the pity looks and hugs from girls I hate, I remember last week it said Prom, Last week me and my friends were making fun off all the girls getting asked to that stupid dance, last week I was ok.

I turn to my locker and get my books, I glance at his locker. It's covered in beautiful pictures of him, and sweet notes, little origami flowers, and hate. In fact there are so many letters that support what he did, so many negative words tapped on that small metal door that it hurts me. It crawls under my skin. It drags its filthy nails threw my gangly arms, leaving fresh crimson to drop out of it. I suddenly see Dixon walk by and rip all of those notes of. He threw them away glanced at me with a straight face and continued to walk outside.

After I close my locker I hear arguing, I look down the hall to see Alex yelling at the superintendent. Her hair is now blond with red tips, she has a brand new tattoo of roses on her shoulder, Her ears and face are pierced a total amount of five times. As for me I dyed all my hair black, I got another tattoo so I'm up to seven, I already have multiple piercings I started this year scaring people with my spiked shoes and dark make up but now, I just look sad.

At least they can hide it. At least he's in a better place. At least everyone has the dignity to stare at me, and judge, and hurt, and pry, No one will talk to me, Everyone is over my pity and with that,

I am alone

I walk to class and sit. I write and write useless, meaning less, stupid, unforgivable, nonexisting, numbing, words. I am so numb that I'm not even here. I'm on a different planet, where feelings don't exist. On this planet I am alone, so no one can hurt me, so no one ever knows how I feel. So no one can judge my pain.

I suddenly hear the door open. "And where have you been Mr.Blake?" Ms.Ross interrogates. I look up slightly to see Dixon handing her a late note. I can't stop seeing him everywhere. The one time I never want to see him again, and he's everywhere. He takes the seat right next to me, and I look down at the words again.

I feel empty being this close to him. I guess I'd feel that with any of them. I couldn't stand my own thoughts, Could I handle theres? Would they still talk to me? Do they miss him like I do? Do they miss me? My thoughts were interrupted by a small piece of paper, landing on the front of my notebook.

There's something eerily familiar about the small fragment of notebook lined paper, and it took me no time to realize who it was from. Dixon's secret notes. It reads 'Need to talk. Later?', I continue to look at the words. My chest hurts, kinda like someone is someone's sitting on it. 'Maybe'. The bell rings and I rush out leaving the note and hoping he never speaks to again.