Shot innocence

1) Downfall

A/N- This is one of my first stories and has not been edited. It may seem slow the first few chapters but it will pick up soon. Also because it is unedited there will be mistakes, so please just comment of you find one. Thanksss

***

I wake suddenly with a pounding in my head. Glancing over at my phone i see that i got 4 hours of sleep. A new record. 

My name is Ariana Crane.

I am 17 years old , 5'5" and some would describe me as small. I am fixing to go into my senior year of high school. I currently live with my granny and mom.

My mom....

I don't let myself think about it as i crawl out of bed and into the bathroom right outside of my bedroom. The upside to being the only one with a room upstairs, no one else uses this bathroom. I stop for a moment taking in my looks. The dark circles under my bloodshot eyes, my long dark hair in a mess on top of my head , chap lips that always seem to be in a frown. This isn't me.... i hate how i let myself go.

I hurry and undress for my shower and without a second thought hopped into the warm inviting stream of water. Once i am done i return to my room.

My room is a faded baby pink with clear strings of lights all around it , my queen sized bed on one side of the room, and my desk, tv, drawers, and chair on the other. My room has become the only place i feel comfortable anymore. It's my spot, the place in this world that is all mine. I walk over to my bookshelf and light my favorite lavender candle that was resting on top. It was one my mom got me before it all happened...

Last summer my mom had a stroke, one that should have killed her. She was strong, it wasn't going to be that easy to get ride of the Mary Crane. She was in the hospital for months, then rehab, and finally home. My mother and me moved in with my granny. It wasn't that hard of a transition considering i have had a bedroom here since i can remember and constantly stayed over. What was hard was seeing my mom. She lost the ability to talk and any movement on her right side. Although she did gain some of her speech back it was still hard.

It was also hard dropping out of high school half way through my junior year. It was what needed to be done. My granny is 70 and couldn't take care of my mom on her own. I did take classes online though, so i would be able to go back for my senior year.

Which is in 2 days.

And i am completely losing it.

I used to have an amazing life. Well maybe not amazing but it was mine and to me it was perfect. I had so many great friends, my mom loved them all so she was never one to keep me from going out with them. I was a straight A student with my head on straight. I was happy and loved life.

Nothing lasts forever though.

After my mom was hospitalized those 'great friends' left. My grades online were barely passing. I hated what happened, and slowly let myself slip away without realizing it. I hated life and how unfair it did my little family. I just want to leave , to never wake up again. But i stay. I don't let myself think those thoughts, or at least I try. 

I recently started writing again which has helped. I write on a site called Wattpad. I guess i'm pretty good at it to because my first short story got 3k views in just a matter of weeks and it has only gone up since then along with me publishing more. 

I used to think of how i might try to get some of my stories published as an adult. Not anymore. Now every decision i make i have to think of my mom. My granny is old and wont be able to help us out forever and there is no way in hell that i would ever put my mom in any sort of nursing home. 

I let out a sigh deciding not to think about it anymore and get dressed to go school shopping. Might as well get this over with.

I just hope when the dreaded day comes i can get some of my friends back and things will somewhat go back to normal.