As soon as you saw an intimidating Tana Mongoose charging at you, you knew that you were in trouble. Especially since she was mad dogging you. Your only instinct was to run, and trust me, you ran. You would assume that you would run the opposite direction of where the threat is coming from but instead, you thought that it was only logical to run towards Tana. I mean, she surely would move from danger, right?
And so you ran at a pretty decent speed towards her to which she dodged your attempt to run her over. But unfortunately, the universe was not in your favor today. And since had Tana dodged, you still kept running.
'Hmm. I didn't think past the part when Tana moves,' you thought.
To say the least, about 2 seconds later you had ran into a skinny built body. To make matters even better, you and the body fell to the solid, concrete floor. Oh how much you wanted to instantly vanish from earth that very instant. Especially since you already knew who you had ran into.
No other then Bryan Le, Ricegum himself.
'Maybe I should see if he's okay...' you thought after a good few seconds after the fall.
Seeing the position you were in, you would be lying if you said you weren't embarrassed to say the least. It's not a regular activity to land on your roaster -- the man you've been having fantasies about -- in a position where you are straddling him. And the look on his face. Priceless.
Was his face full of shock? I guess you could say that. Was he flustered? Maybe a tad bit. But was he angry? Oh yes, yes he was.
It's safe to assume that a red face and eyebrows basically perpendicular to the ground is a face of pure anger.
But did he push you off? No. Did he...I don't know, ask you to get off of him? Nope. Hmm, looks like we have a very interesting situation here.
'That's interesting. He's staring directly into my eyes. Is he trying to intimidate me? No, no. If anything, he's -- wait, I know that look.'
And so you put two and two together and then it hit you.
Maybe he doesn't hate you, maybe he doesn't like you. Maybe he "like-likes" you.
And as cliché as it sounds, the two of you were getting closer and closer to each other, almost comparable to the rate of change in an exponential graph. And as soon as your dream was about to come true, as soon as you were about to kiss your crush--your practical hater, it all ended. Satan worshipper Tana came over and pushed you off of Bryan.
"How dare you have the audacity to come running at me, trying to kill me!" She yelled.
More things like "you bigot" and "you whore" and blah blah blah came out of her mouth. But it didn't matter. Because guess who was having a sexy stare down with the hottest Asian alive. You. With Bryan. Bryan being the sexy Asian. And all you could muster was a simple "Mhmm" in reply to all the horrible things that Tana was saying to you.
And then it got physical. Now let's put this into perspective here:
Imagine you are being yelled at viscously by a very angry woman. And let's just hypothetically say that you had no interest in listening to what this woman had to say and so you ignore her. This makes the woman look crazy while you look like the victim. And let's imagine that because this woman realizes that you aren't listening to her that she decides to take an alternate route to show you how much angry she has towards you. And so she decides to slap you. Ouch.
'Ouchie' to say the least is what came up in your mind. Mind you this whole time both yourself and Bryan haven't said anything. So when security comes to drag Tana away, it gets real awkward real quick.
"Umm," you began.
'Shit what do I say,'
"Gotta blast," you said, making at 180° and fast walking to wherever Leslie was at.
'WHY WOULD I QUOTE AN OLD MEME' you questioned yourself.
'AND WHERE THE HELL IS LESLIE!'
-------------
It had been around an hour and a half before you found Leslie in Topshop. But by the time you found her, your encounterment with Bryan had already made the trending tab on YouTube and the top hashtag on Twitter. #brawlingbryan is not something to be happy about. But back to Leslie. Her supposed reason for abandoning you was because she heard Ricegum was giving free merch at Topshop and she just had to get a shirt and had to be the first in line.
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But no worry, she made sure to get you a shirt as well. Wonderful.
To say the least, because Leslie was such a good friend and decided to get you a shirt, you decided it was only human to take the shirt and reject her friendship along with her current living state in you home. If you were going to have someone live with you, you decided it would only be rational to live with someone who will be there by your side when you're in a time of need, vise versa.
And as soon as you knew it, Leslie was long gone. Good, one less negative thing for you to worry about. Now lets get back in on that Ricegum beef.
While scrolling through several videos on Twitter, you fell upon a video that left you loss of words. You had totally forgotten that you and Bryan had almost kissed. But luckily there was the video to help remind you and bring along a whole bunch more chaos with it. Splendid.
That's what you needed. Some coffee with some good 'ol Splendid sweetener in it. Oh god, did coffee sound good. And so you got some coffee and proceeded to retreat into your bed in hopes of forgetting your absolutely terrible life. And to your future-self's surprise, you eventually fell asleep.
