The Lives We Lead

ONE

Thea glanced one last time around the empty room that she had called hers for the last year. The walls were a stark white, the bed looked lonely, like an island in the center of the small room. It was so bare now, you couldn't tell by looking that someone had made this place their home. But that was just it, this place wasn't home. Home was where she was headed once the last box that still remained on the bed was put into her mum's car and they drove away.

She had finally finished her A-Level exams and it was time to leave, there was officially nothing more the school could teach her. And everything hung on results day. Her mother had barely been able to afford to send her for her last year, but after last summer there was no way she could stay. She needed to get out of Haven for a while. But school was over now, the year had gone quicker than expected, and so she was going back home.

Home. It's funny how one word can have so many connotations. When you think of home you want to think of warmth and love, those are the thoughts most people have. But for Thea, that was not what came to mind. When she thought of that word she could almost smell the burning rubber again, hear the shriek-

She shook her head, trying to clear the memories away, to put them back in the little box in the furthest corner of her mind where they had stayed for the last ten months; she wasn't even back there yet and the nightmares were already spilling into her daily thoughts.

"Are you ready, sweetheart?" Paisley Greer's voice was thick with concern when she looked at her daughter's face. Thea turned slightly to face her, glad that her mum was there to break her out of her own head. She nodded and tried to smile but it felt too forced, so she gave up. Paisley could see the struggle in her eyes, "Don't worry, Thea, everything is going to be okay." It sounded like a promise, but you can't promise something when you don't know what the outcome will be. So the words did very little to settle her thoughts.

Thea's gaze narrowed in on Melissa stood in the doorway behind her mum, a perfect smile on her face. She had been one of Thea's closest friends here at The Academy. She always managed to look effortlessly stunning, but when she turned slightly, you could see the scar running from the corner of her right eye to her chin. It changed her beauty; it didn't take it away but made it a harder, fiercer beauty that was hard to achieve. One thing that Thea had quickly learned was that she wasn't the only one with a past she wanted to run from.

"You're so lucky that you get to go home today, Thea," Mel's words seemed innocent enough, but only a trained ear could pick up her slightly clipped tone and only a trained eye could see the sadness that crept into her eyes, "Promise me you will keep in touch. You have my number. I'm here if you need me, and I want to hear all about home."

Thea nodded, "Of course I will don't worry! I'll give you all the gossip, I promise," and as she said the words she knew she wouldn't be able to keep that promise; she knew that eventually they would lose contact and it would be almost as if they had never even met. Maybe it would be easier, kinder in a way, to not even text at all.

"Maybe you could come over to ours for a few days during the holidays, that would be nice, wouldn't it, Theodora?" Paisley suggested to Melissa. They had only met once before at Christmas break when she had to come to the school because Thea was still refusing to come home, but she had taken quite a liking to the girl. And Melissa knew exactly how to appease parents.

Mel nodded, "The offer is lovely, thank you, Ms. Greer." Her smile dropped completely, making her look like a sad doll. The two girls looked at each other, they both knew that it wouldn't happen, and for that Thea was selfishly glad. She couldn't have someone like Melissa running around Haven. She didn't want Mel to know the girl she used to be, and she most certainly didn't want her to know what had happened.