The sun woke me up. I sat up quickly and threw up all over myself. I wiped my mouth and shakily pressed the nurse button. I could hear her walking towards me and I felt vomit rise up in my throat. I opened my mouth and a fountain of brown vomit exited my mouth. I could her the nurse gag as she stepped towards my bed. She motions me to get up and I slowly abide. I get up and plant my bare feet on the cold metal floor and crouched in a ball. I was feeling really nauseous and I could feel more vomit coming up in my mouth, but I didn't want to be sick again. The nurse would look at me and think that I have a weak stomach. I swallowed and got up from the floor. Everything started to turn and I got majorly dizzy. I felt a huge wave of vomit rise, but I declined it and it settled down in my stomach. I tapped the nurse on the shoulder and she whipped around.
"I don't feel very good." I say. My voice sounds like I have water in my mouth. Her face goes from utter disgust to sympathy. She touches my shoulder and points to the bathroom. I nod my thanks and run inside. I open up the toilet seat and gallons upon gallons of vomit comes from my mouth. It's a varies in colors. From green to brown to yellow. I swear to you, I literally threw up the rainbow. When I'm done, I walk out and calmly lay down. I pick up my computer and watch some TV.
...............................................................................
Around noon, someone knocks on my door. I take my headphones off and close my computer screen. I set it down on the nightstand next to me and look up. Melanie has tears down her cheeks and her eyes are puffy from crying so much. I smile and motion for her to come by me. She wiped her nose with the back of her hand and walks over, her heel clicking the metal floor as she crosses.
"Hi." I say, my voice no longer sounding as if I had water in it.
"Hi." she says, sounding like she's going to burst in to tears at any second.
"You look great." I say.
"And you look like you've put on some weight." she says. To someone who doesn't have anorexia, this is probably the most in inappropriate thing ever, but to me, it makes my heart lift. I smiled.
"What made you cry when you came to see me?" I ask. She shakes her head an I touch her hand. He looks up at me and I nod my head, she nods too.
"Well, I saw you and you...you look so unhealthy Flower." she bursts in to tears. Her face contorts from trying to talk and sob at the same time. "You look worse than before F. Your hair looks hideous and your teeth are yellow from the chemo I guess. Your wrists are so tiny and your hair Flower! You have no hair!" She collapsed on my bed and I touch my scalp. I had forgotten to put on my bandanna. I grab her hand and ah looks at me.
"I'm by scared at all Mel. Whatever God has chosen for me, is what I'll get." She nods her head and wipes her nose with the back of her hand.
...............................................................................
Melanie leaves after about an hour. She says that he had to study, but I don't believe her. I don't blame her either. I wouldn't want to spend time with "the dying girl" either. When she leaves, they bring me to the chemo room. After chemo they scan my brain and I get to go back to my room. After another hour, my doctor (Doctor Johnson) comes in my room and sits on my bed quietly. I remove my headphones and shut down my laptop.
"Flower, we have some good news...and some bad news." I nod. "The Geom Barre that you were diagnosed with, is now at a good level. Do you know what that means?" I nod. My throat tightening. If that was the good news, than what's the bad? "now the bad news is that the tumor in your head," she puts her finger on the place where the tumor is. "Is growing." My throat closes. I feel dizzy and planted to the ground. Dr. Johnson puts her hand on my knee.
"That means that chemo isn't working. We still have radiation as an option." I nod, tears blurring my vision.
"We'll start radiation tomorrow." She stays for a minute, her hand on my knee. Then she gets up...and leaves.
..............................................................................
I don't wake up to the sun, instead I wake up to the piercing pain in my tumor. I scream in pain and nurses rush in. They ask me what's wrong and I point to my head. They nod and run out of the door to get the doctor. Dr. Johnson sets me in to bed and put pain killers in my IV bag. After awhile the pain subsides and I get sleepy. I slowly slip in to sleep when I hear the Johnson talking to one of my nurses.
"Are you going to tell her?" the nurse asks.
"Of course not! She's a 21 year old women and has a lot of things to do on her life." The doctor says.
"But how much time does she have to so all of the things that 21 year olds do?" the nurse asks sarcastically.
"A couple months." I can hear the doctor choke up as she says it. "She had up to 2 months to live."
YOU ARE READING
Too Skinny
General Fiction"Hi. My name is Flower and I'm 21 years old. I have brain cancer, epilepsy, geom barre, and anorexia. As you can probably tell, I have an awesome life." I smile and put my pen down. That was even more stupid then the first one. Okay how about this:...
