Bad Things

18. Hold On

"Sandra?" a voice called from behind Camilla and her mother.

They turned to find a red-haired woman with a gentle smile sitting a couple tables back. Camila's mother retuned the smile and then said to her daughter, "I'll be right back, okay?"

Camila could do nothing but nod. She felt like there was something stuck in her throat, like even if she tried to speak nothing would come out but a bunch of squeaks and grunts. Her mother crossed to the table and hugged the woman. Camila had no idea who this person was; she'd never seen her before in her life, but her mother seemed to know her quite well.

"Way to go, you two," Alex said, and Camila turned back around in time to see him lean back into his chair and interlock his hands behind his head. "Way to not look awkward and weird."

Shawn threw a shriveled piece of fry at him.

"I'm sorry," Camila said. "I didn't know you'd be here, and then Alex waved and she—" Camila noticed Alex studying her, his brows furrowed and his eyes on her abdomen. "What—what are you doing? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Trying to see if I can tell. Dude," he looked at Shawn, "I can't see anything."

Shawn groaned, and it took Camila a few seconds to realize what he meant. "Trying to see—" She whipped her head toward Shawn. An irrational flare of anger shot through her. "You told him? Why did you tell him?" Her voice came out in an accusing hiss.

Finally, Shawn's gaze met hers. "What? I'm not allowed to tell my best friend? You told yours."

"I—" Camila's mouth hung open for a moment as she tried to grasp the right words. "That's—that's not what I meant."

"Isn't it?"

"No. I—I just—Haiz was with me when I found out and ..."

"And what?" he demanded, and Camila could see now that the off feeling she'd been getting from him was anger. "You're not the only one in this, Mila. You're not the only one this affects, and you're not the only one who needs someone to talk to sometimes."

"But we talk. We—"

Shawn looked away from her and stared at the wall. "Sometimes I need someone else to talk to besides just you."

She knew what he meant, but it hurt all the same.

"Oh, wow. Awkward lovers' spat is awkward," Alex said, and grasped a pair of headphones from his pocket, shoving them into his ears. "I'm just going to be over here, pretending I don't know you for the duration of this quarrel."

Camila stood still for a moment, her fists clenching and unclenching at her side. She wasn't quite sure what to do or say. She knew she had no right to be upset that Shawn had told Alex, knew it in her heart, but she was still angry and embarrassed. And she could understand that Shawn might be frustrated with her for the same reasons, but this didn't seem like that. It didn't even seem like this was a reaction to meeting her mom either. It seemed like something more. "What's wrong with you? Did I do something in the time we've been apart to piss you off?"