Our Summers

CHAPTER EIGHT

“There will always be someone willing to hurt you, put you down, gossip about you, belittle your accomplishments and judge your soul. It is a fact that we all must face. However, if you realize that God is a best friend that stands beside you when others cast stones you will never be afraid, never feel worthless and never feel alone.”

-Shannon L. Alder

I decided to go to Brandy's party with the boys and, to our joint annoyance, so did Cassy. "Where is this party at?" Cassy whined. Christian, who sat next to Kaden and the farthest from Cassy punched the window. I flinched along with Grant. "It's at the lake." Haden said giving Cassy a kind smile. She grinned sucking it in "Oooh a lake? like a summer camp type lake or a small ocean outlet type thing?" she asked batting her eyelids at Haden who shot me a look that clearly said he regretted speaking up. "It's a fucking lake Cassy." Christian growled. Cassy sighed and stared out the window. I didn't feel the least bit guilty about the situation. Sure Christian's my brother and I want to protect him just as much as he wants to protect me, but pretending he wasn't hurting me and that he really had a chance with Cassy would only destroy both of us. Besides, I was tired of letting her steam-roll my life. "Thank-god" Cassy muttered when we came to a stop. Grant took my hand and we practically flew out the truck. "The tension rolling off of all of us was horrible. This is why i stay away from people." he muttered. I rolled my eyes "You mean this is why you simply fuck girls and stay away from guys and family." i corrected. Grant grinned "You get me." he said as Haden joined us. "I hope she doesn't. For someone to understand you they'd have to be as ethically devoid as you are." he muttered. I laughed and Grant frowned "At least i'm not spitting out words like ethically devoid. What the hell is that?" Grant shook his head when i laughed harder, but he squeezed my hand. It's another thing i missed about my summers here. Grant and me used to get along perfectly. He was even more shy then Kaden, but so much more protective then even Christian.  I remember one summer when Brandy punched me he went and told her older brother that she'd been fucking his best friend in the hayloft of the barn near the old mill. She wasn't allowed to come out for the rest of the summer and the next one he helped me set up firecrackers that went off when she went back into the barn.

Me, Haden, Grant, Christian, and my real best-friend Stevie sat around one of the many bonfires telling stories of how things used to be. I was curled up in Grant's lap with my head on his shoulder. "Sure you don't want to go back to the house? I really don't mind." Grant whispered for the tenth time. "I'm starting to think you want to use me as an excuse to get away from Christian's evil eye." i whispered back laughing. Grant looked up at Christian then coughed "Maybe." he muttered. I was laughing again when i noticed the noise had died down. I looked up to see if they were going to set off fireworks, It's what we usually did at the first summer party of the year, and i froze. Grant stiffened in response and looked around his gaze finally settling on the same thing as mine. "Isn't that-" i stood and moved around the bonfire. Dustin's gaze landed on me and i paused for a second before running right at him and throwing my arms around him. "You stopped calling. Eric said you left. You had me so worried Ellie." he whispered in my ear as he held me. "I lost him. Our baby, i lost our baby." i whispered. I couldn't cry, the sorrow was too deep to be released in a few drops of salt water. "We'll get through this. Just don't run away from me again. I'm sorry i left Ellie i'm so sorry i left you. Please just give me one more chance." he begged pulling back and resting his forehead on mine. "I can never say no to you." i whispered back sadly. It was true. No matter how i felt or what he did to me i would always come back. It's my only weakness. He's my only weakness.

 "So you slept with my sister and then took off to join the army." Christian repeated for the third time as he stared into his cup and swished the dark liquid around. "It wasn't like that." Dustin muttered. Christian laughed, but it was off and for the first time i felt horrible for telling him abuout Cassy. Speaking of Cassy she'd strangely disappeared when Dustin arrived. I glanced around but didn't see her. "So basically you've once again done the right thing and i've done the wrong thing. Just like when we were kids. I break Noelle's doll, you buy her a new one. I get Noelle a red ribbon, you get her a blue. I screw Cassy, you knock up my sister. Life sucks." Christian spat glaring into his cup. "That's not how it is Christian. You know i love you and everything you do for me. It's never been a competition." i said shaking out my head. Dustin snorted "Of course it has, and you always choose him. The way i remember i got her a blue ribbon, you got her red and it was her new favorite color. You join the army and your her hero, i join and i'm the asshole who abandoned his girlfriend and kid. If anybody has complaining rights it's me." he said rolling his eyes. "Well neither of you have complaining rights. Because it's not a competition. I love you both, not the same way because that would be nasty, but i love you both the same amount." I told them smiling. " You can say that, but it's always been a competition to us." Christian replied with a shrug. "From what I've heard Ellie only actually loves one guy and it's not either of you." Cassy's words slurred together as she plopped down next to Haden. I froze and Dustin's arms tensed around me. "Please don't Cassy." he said quietly. Cassy laughed then pointed at me "Your a slut, a nasty dirty slut. I'm glad you lost that damm thing because I don't believe it was my brothers. I think that it was his." she pointed at Kaden who was sitting on the ground talking to Jenna Hardy. He looked up and blinked "I didn't realize you knew how to think." he said before turning back to Jenna. Cassy glared at him "You all think I'm stupid. But I'm not, I know things, lots of things. like how you came and took Noelle on a little trip to New Orleans. And you both went to the early-acceptance conference for Princeton and stayed holed up in your hotel room. I know you were fucking when Christian went off to basic and I know your other dirty little secret." she ranted. Dustin beat me too replying "Shut the hell up Cassy. Just shut the hell up, and get your own damm life." Everyone in the circle was listening quietly. I hadn't been hurt by Cassy's words, they were things in the past but her next words made my heart skip a beat "I also know your secret Dusty. Did you tell your precious Noelle that you got your little side girl pregnant as well?" she spat before getting up and disappearing into the dark once again.