St. Peter's List

Chapter twenty three

I found it hard to breathe as I walked down the grand staircase with my hand being held up by Benjamin. My cheeks flushed bright red, my eyes darted wildly around the ballroom, I've never seen this many men and women at an event, ever. If I was supposed to be apart of the "aristocratic" American life, I should get used to this sight. Hundreds of women in large and round dresses paraded around with men dressed in royal blue and gold. Ben was dress in his uniform. His blue shoulder pad glistened with golden tassels. His uniform was lined with the same type of gold. I couldn't they but blush. My man was incredibly handsome. His brownish blonde hair lacked its usual messiness and was neatly tied back. Though being out here in public with him was fantastic, my heart longed to be alone with my new husband. I hoped he felt the same.
Everyone continued dancing around us and we joined them as well. I noticed that Ben's close friend, Caleb Brewster had not been around us since we left my house. I hoped he would be attending this ball. I spun around with Ben's guiding hand, I couldn't help but see that he too had notice the absence of his friend.
For a moment, everyone stopped. I nearly gasped at the sight of the two people on top of the stairs. None other than George Washington himself stood upon the stairs. His wife, Martha stood on his left. Martha stood in a elegant green dress with lace ruffles like my own on the chest part of her dress. I smiled at the attention to details on her dress. Washington stood stoically next to her, he held her hand up as well as the went down the stairs. George was dressed in a black velvety coat. Their clothing showed their power. Everyone was absolutely silent as they walked, until they reached the ground floor. At once he was surrounded by men and women waiting to meet him. George and Martha looked to be overwhelmed so quickly, and I could not blame them. They tried moving away from the crowd surrounding behind them only to meet more people.
"We should meet them later tonight," Benjamin suggested. I nodded in agreement. The two of us moved away from the ever growing mass of people coming to meet the pair. It would be a lie to say that I did not hold any interest in meeting Washington and Martha. Meeting the pair would be like meeting the King and Queen of France, no one can truly say that had no interest in meeting them. Ben and I wavered away from the glamorous party to the garden behind the house.
The garden was almost as well put together as our party. "When do you think we should go in?" I asked my husband/
"When the crowds die down, I feel terrible for General Washington, for he cannot stand to be charged by people like that." He mentioned, I nodded as if I understood my brunette husband. I took his arm as he lead me through a hallway of roses.
"They're pretty, are they not?" I kept my eye on a large rose flower as we passed.
:They are indeed, but I prefer lavenders over roses." He glanced at a bright red rose.
"Home come? Roses possess such beauty." I gripped his arm,
He nearly shrugged off my comment, to which I was some what offended. "I think they have more practical use, they taste great in foods but I guess, aesthetically speaking, roses are the most beautiful of all flowers.
"I assume you're right," I looked back at my dress, whose ruffles were lined with roses,"what do you think of my gown?" I asked,"it is pleasing, aesthetic all speaking?" I began to tease.
"Why, of course it is." He smiled and lead me to a new section of flowers.
I glanced to the windows to see that the party was once again, in full swing. I heard the band playing elegantly from outside,"shall we go in?" I asked. The warm and golden glow invited us back in from the cold air.
"Of course, possibly now we can have a word with the General."he put his hand on mine and walked me inside,"perhaps we can learn more besides our favorite flower once we get home?" He asked playfully.
"Well, I don't see a reason not to," I giggled.
And so, we entered the ballroom again. From where we were standing, I still saw a few heads bobbling around Washington. While we waited for the few heads to disappear we danced. A step here. A step here. Follow where his hands lead you, spin and repeat.  Another step, another step,follow through and spin. My legs began to show tiredness after many repetitions of the same movements but I was determined to make it to the end of the dance without quitting. My corset began to feel tighter than ever
By the time the dance ended, the ballroom had settled down. Everyone began to talk quietly amongst themselves. A few groups of people came to me and Ben and congratulated us on our marriage. We earned good wishes and flowers from young girls. A small blonde girl came to me with a pale pink rose. She asked me if she could put it in my hair. I nodded and knelt down to her level. She gently placed the rose in my hair. "I hope I can be a princess like you one day," she smiled sweetly
"I am no princess, dear, but I assure you will have a happy life," she kissed my cheek before she ran off giggling, her blue dress flying after her feet.
"Such a cute child," I smiled and stood up, touching the rose in my hair. A thorn from the stem jabbed at my head.
"Shall we see the General now?" Ben asked, touching the petals at the soft pink rose. I nodded in agreement and walked off with my new husband to Washington.
He seemed to be larger than life. He held himself up with as much confidence as a king. I avoided eye contact with him, he stony blue eyes made me quiver. He stood above six feet high, his height made me feel terribly small. Benjamin talked to him with such ease but also with the same amount of respect. Martha's gaze fell upon my small figure, I too avoided her eye contact,
"Why don't you speak, child?" She asked.
"I know not what to say, ma'am." I said politely, giving her a small smile.
"Very well, what is your name? Married to Major Tallmadge, and yet I know not of your name?"
"It is, Anna Tallmadge,ma'am." I blushed from embaressment.
She nodded as if she was taking in my name letter by letter,"How long have you been in his presence?"
"Since two weeks ago or so, he was quartered at my home, there we met." I smiled more easily. She nodded again.
"It is nice to see such young people in the midst of love." She added.
"I assume so, how long will it last?" I lowered my voice.
"As long as you allow it to, love can last a long time or a few days depending on how close you keep it to yourself." She glanced up at her husband and saw that he and Benjamin were in a deep talk,"shall we go on a short walk?" Her eyes fell upon me again.
"I would be obliged to," I commented as she led me out from the ballroom and to a long hallway. For what seemed like half an hour we talked and discussed husbands and I asked about family life with her and Washington. I assume she felt comfortable with me and insisted that I call Washington "George," and herself, "Martha". I do not know how or why she felt so comfortable with my presence by I was by no means uninviting her. Martha was a older, but pretty woman. Her wrinkles around her lips showed ages of smiles without regret. Her cheeks were as red as beets.
"Shall we send letters to one another?" Martha asked, a smile swelled upon her face.
"I see no reason not to, Mrs. Washington," I replied.
"Please, it is Martha to you, dear."
"Then it shall be done, Martha." I smiled, my cheeks burning up again.
We once again entered the ballroom. "Are your parents present?" Martha questioned me.
"I think they must be, though I have not seen them tonight." I answered her, glancing around the room for their familiar faces. I could not find one of theirs. Martha nodded,"I'll be returning to my spouse, you will come with me, yes?" she asked me. I nodded and followed her back to the General and my Benjamin.
George nodded Ben off, Ben lead me off onto the other side of the room. His face looked paler than usual and he didn't make any contact or conversation with me, this was very strange. "What is the matter?" I asked cautiously.
"Mrs. Washington seems to have a liking for you, doesn't she?"  He changed the subject.
I agreed with him,"She's asked to write letters to me," I bit my finger, I didn't know why he didn't want to mention his true feelings to me. I was his wife, were husbands supposed to confide in their wives? I thought they did. Maybe I was wrong?
I didn't want to stay at the party any longer, I wanted to leave. The attention we were receiving as a newly wedded couple was exhausting. My corset was making it hard to breathe, I felt the undergarment digging into my sides. I tugged at Benjamin's arm sleeve while he was talking to another man. "What is it, dear?" The solemn look in his eyes made his smile uneasy.
"I would like to return home with you." I said meekly," I do apologize."
"Do not fret, our carriage shall be here at half past twelve, it is eleven now, go, now socialize, okay? I shall wait for you." He let me run freely amongst the women and men. Children seemed to have the greatest attraction to me, most wanted me to dance and play with them. A mother of a child said I had a motherly demeanor to myself. I thanked the woman and returned to her clingy blonde boy. He was about the age of four but as clingy as a newborn baby. Her boy clang onto my dress tightly. "it's getting late, dear, you should return to your mother." I smiled and patted the boy's white blonde hair. he protested against my works.
"May I stay with you?" he voice asked me pitifully.
"I do apologize, I do not believe you can." I tried letting him down lightly, I did not want to make a large scene. I watched him pout until Ben came behind me.
"I hope it's not too much of a pain that I steal this woman from you," Ben smiled and placed his firm hands on my corseted waist. The boy whined before giving up and returning to his mother who was in the midst of speaking to another man. The bony figure of the woman made me uneasy. he greying hair was somewhat ratty and her dress looked worn, but she did wear the black think well. I gave them both words of thank you before sending them out the door.
"Is the General still here?" I questioned Ben. He shook his head in reply and Saudi they have left a long time ago.
"Well then I suppose that we return home?"
"indeed, our carriage should be here shortly." Ben moved his hands from my body,"Is it bad that I am some excited to sleep with you tonight?" Ben's gave didn't waver from me. His icy blue eyes kept me still. Some how I forgot that we would be sleeping together instead of being in separate rooms. I blushed and glanced away from the man. I knew that we did have sex before, I did enjoy it even though pain did ensue. Should it be any different once wedded?
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we arrived at home when the moon was still beaming high in the night sky. Kitt opened the door and greeted us with a tired hello. I thanked her and sent her off to bed. The poor dear, she looked like she had been up all night. I patted her back and watched her return to her room under the stairway. I pursed my lips and shook my head. "We need to get her a room, that isn't under the stairs." I turned back to my husband. He nodded tiresomely in agreement and grabbed my arm too bring me upstairs. I followed him without hesitation.
"Have you