A Ballot of the Wolf and Merc | Ubbe Ragnarsson FanFic

Lets Hurt Together

Gazing out in slow swiveling motion Eleri was coming to terms with how dislocated she really had become with the world outside Kattegat. Mindless travel was what she'd thrived on. Making mistakes and finding her next point of interest. The next clue. The next trail to lead her forward towards her goal. There was always something.

What was there now? Alone in the forest. The visions of Ragnar's death. Repeated dreams of mutilation to her internal organs, undoubtedly from the prolonged ingestion of her pennyroyal. Nothing made sense. Nothing helped her see forward. Everything so muddled and foggy Eleri wasn't sure where she even stood in life anymore. She'd lost her way, lost her fire.

"...I'd ask you if your parents taught you not to draw attention to yourself, but, well, I'm not Ivar," remarkably even though Eleri thought she was lost in the thicket, the tender jesting voice that greeted her from behind her left side showed Eleri the complete opposite. No attempt to play sneaky, Ubbe stepped within the semi clearing Eleri had stopped within. Seeing the look of astonishment on her face made Ubbe's remark sly about how untrackable Eleri always claimed to be, "...I told you varagain, I wouldn't have been a burden on journey to those bowyers and craftsmen you spoke of."

The firm hold Eleri had kept on her watery eyes quivered when they laid sight on Ubbe. Like a blessing she didn't know what to do with Eleri fought off the threat of the dam keeping her tears at bay. Blinking away the dewy water line of her lashes Eleri stared wordless at the viking far out of arm's reach of her. It wasn't until the lump in her throat only successfully came out in a squeak of a question, "..w-what are you even- how-"

Dropping those sparkling blue eyes Ubbe could be seen shifting his weight nervously from one foot to the other. Obviously unsure of how to speak before the woman, "...I..I had...well I wanted to...I wanted to say sorry before you left." Ubbe's confession came with him looking back up over at her, "We are going to rally a war against Aelle's actions....and I wanted to give a proper apology before you took your separate way."

"Apology?" Eleri's mind muddled not making a solid connection out of what the man before her was saying.

Ubbe's shoulders rose a little as he took a deep breath only holding it a moment before letting it go to calm his nerves, "...I was selfish, in...in how I've been the last few months. As well as when Ivar did what he did. I shouldn't have lashed out at you, Ivar was in the wrong doing."

Eyes going from dry as a summer day to flooded with big globs of shimmering tears that rolled down her rosy cheeks, Eleri too overwhelmed to even figure out how to use her voice. Ubbe did not insist on her saying anything. Instead the viking approached the stone still varagain with gentle intent. Moving his gaze over the woman's face, like he'd seen her for the first time all over again, Ubbe bit down on his bottom lip when the tears only steadily flowed down her cheeks when he approached.

Slowly reaching into his left pocket Ubbe had no problem producing the small leather satchel Ivar had desecrated not too long before. Offering it to her only for Eleri to take what she expected to be her empty satchel in her right hand. It wasn't empty though. Quite the opposite as the pouch was stuffed full. Confused Eleri unbound the knot she clearly didn't tie on it. Only to find it packed full of new pennyroyal. Not just picked and stuffed in. The herb actually stripped of its stem, dried to perfection and layered thick in the leather confines. Aghast by being handed the full sewn hide and not just the empty container she'd last seen it as, Eleri was frozen in place with slate eyes darting up to look at Ubbe for an explanation.

Her surprise distinct, Ubbe inhaled a nerve calming breath and nodded before speaking, "...I thought what I wanted was the right thing. That I was right, like I've always been with the other three." Ubbe's eyes moved from the satchel in Eleri's hand to meeting her grey ones that poured with dribbling tears, "You aren't them. You aren't my Mother, you aren't Margrethe. You aren't even a viking...and I was wrong."