Broken Trails

Broken

Mayra moved the container of food to her left hand and shifted her bag to the crook of her arm before slowly pushing the door open. Without looking ahead she stepped into the room and closed the door behind her. When Haroon saw her step into the room his heart stopped, he wanted to hide, to magically disappear but he couldn't, he clenched his jaw and waited for her to turn. Mayra turned around and when she saw him she didn't know what to do, she wasn't sure if she should cry or run away. Mayra remembered her words and although her legs felt weak, she stood her ground. She tried to walk but her legs would not move, she was in a state of shock. Their eyes locked momentarily, tears flooded her eyes and she wiped them away quickly before slowly walking toward him trying to use that time to pull herself together. She wanted to say something but she couldn't think of anything appropriate to say. "I brought you some food." She finally croaked. Haroon looked up into her puffy red eyes that spoke of many tears. "Thank you, May." He replied quietly. "I'm sorry...I just couldn't hold back from coming in...I-I...needed to see you." She explained. Haroon didn't reply, he just nodded to show understanding." "Can I sit here...next to you?" she asked touching the side of the bed with her hand. Haroon nodded. She set her bag on the floor and sat down facing him. "We're gonna get through this." She said picking up his hand "I'm gonna take care of you." She told him in a voice shakier than she expected it to be and she bit the insides of her cheek. A heavy tear escaped her eye to run down her cheek and dangle from her chin. Haroon's heart ached as he watched it. "This is all a test...you'll be better soon." Haroon tried to smile for her but his lips seemed stiff. "I made some mac and cheese with fried chicken." Haroon wasn't hungry but she looked so broken, he didn't have the heart to refuse. "Mmm, sounds yummy." Mayra reached for her bag and dug around for the fork she had packed. She refused to look at the burnt side of him, it hurt her too much. Haroon noticed that she avoided looking at his burns and that seemed to confirm his fears. (She can't stand the sight of me.) he thought (I don't want her to live like this.) Suddenly he didn't even want to try eating "Mayra...I can't eat, I'm really not hungry...you can just leave the food here, find my mom...and go home with her." Mayra searched his eyes and only found pain "B-but I want to stay with you." "No...go home, the drugs are wearing off, please go now." Mayra's heart was heavy, she didn't want to leave him "Okay I'll wait out in the lobby." Haroon gave her grim look "Please Mayra... Go home." Mayra averted her eyes and pressed her lips together sadly. "Okay, I'll see you later then." Haroon nodded. She placed the container by the bed and leaned over to kiss his cheek. She was dying to hug him but she didn't want to hurt him. "Don't forget to lock up the house...pack some things and go over to ma's house." "Okay." She said picking up her bag, she wanted to tell him that she loved him but she knew she would break down if she tried. Haroon watched her leave and he clenched his jaw, she wasn't for him anymore and just the thought hurt so much, he closed his eyes against it and felt a warm tears forming in his eyes. (I have to end this as soon as possible.)He thought and prayed for strength.

"It's too late, we can leave first thing tomorrow morning." Khalid told his family, they had all gathered in their living room. Janaan was shaking her head, Ramzia was nodding and Fatima was staring at a wall blankly. "B-but what if we're too late, we need to leave now." Janaan complained. "A'uthubillah! Janaan, stop talking like that...they said he's going to be fine...what would we be too late for?" Ramzia said "Yeah and he probably wouldn't want visitors just yet." Khalid added. "That's true...imagine...I mean, he didn't even want Mayra to see him." Fatima added. "So it's settled, we leave tomorrow, inshallah after Fajr." Khalid told them. After that, no one spoke, each person lost in their own train of thoughts and the only the sound of Yusuf playing with his toy truck could be heard in the silence.

Mayra lay in Fatima and Janaan's old room staring at the ceiling. She was so tired but she couldn't sleep. Her head hurt and her eyes felt sore but the most pain she felt was in her heart, it ached like never before. "Meow" cried Twinkles who seemed to know that she was hurting, she rubbed up against Mayra as if to comfort her. Mayra picked her up and placed her on her chest "Everything is going to be okay." She whispered more to herself than to twinkles. Twinkles purred back in agreement. "Everything will be fine." She added as a tear rolled down and into her ear. A knock came at the door "Come in." Mayra said sitting up and wiping her eyes quickly. Ghaada stepped into the room "Have you eaten anything yet?" Mayra shook her head "I can't eat...I'm not hungry." "You need to eat something sweetie." "I can't." "Alright, maybe later then...I'll be in my room okay." "Okay." Mayra replied and watched Ghaada leave the room. She lay back and rested her head on the pillows, she closed her heavy eye lids and finally sleep came.