"So hurry up and run to the one that you love
And blind him with your kindness
And he'll make war, oh war, on who you were before
And claim all that has spoiled in your heart."
-BRIGHT EYES, "MAKE WAR"
What is James now, you ask? He is the best person you could have beside you after a break-up. The safety net at the bottom of a pit, the parachute after jumping off a moving plane.
Ever since I told him about my secret admirer and my ex, he never left my side. He took care of me without judgment, and did everything to make me feel that I had not just lost two people in my life.
Here is the list of things that we had done in the past three months after that conversation during plane ride:
He helped me shop for make-up and didn't even protest when I swatched a couple of lipsticks on his hand. I let him try the eyeliner on me, and when I looked at the mirror, I saw the fiercest wings on both of my eyelids. I laughed so hard that night.
We went on road trips together a lot. He was always the designated driver, so he always brought his car. His ride is lovely, but I couldn't take the strong smell of leather, so I asked him several times to buy a car freshener. He always forgot to buy one, so I had to use my perfume every time. In the end, I just left the bottle in the glove compartment.
I took him to Van Gogh is Bipolar, and he loved it. He told me, "Wow. This place looks like its made for someone who has loved to the point of mayhem." I replied with, "How do you know if love has reached that point?" And we both spilled our minds and hearts as we poured champagne into our goblets.
We went shopping almost every other night. He even knew what my PIN was. Yup, that often.
He let me re-arrange his closet, which made my OC heart very happy. He also gave me a few things from his room.
We visited a common friend at the hospital and surprised her with daisies and a fruit basket. When I went home, I found out there were more flowers in the trunk. He said they were for me.
Every night before we part ways, he would give me a single band-aide with a cute design, and as a joke, he would say, "For your heart." And every night, I'd smack him on his right arm, laughing as I walk away.
Like I said, my safety net and parachute. Let's ignore the fact that I used those two descriptions while I knew fully that these both involve falling.
Tonight, he was on the phone trying to convince me that tonight was a good night to spend at BGC, and I was not having it.
"Nadine, come on. It'll be fun."
"James, tomorrow's a work day. I can't." I sighed in frustration.
"You don't have to drink. You can still have fun." He said desperately. I slumped on the bed and shut my eyes as I try to comprehend his reasoning.
"Eh, what will I do there? Chaperone? I'm not going. Ikaw na lang."
"I'll be your wing man if you like! You can finally meet new people! After all those band-aides I already gave you. I guess that heart of yours already fixed. About time, right?" He said enthusiastically, which made me go from frustrated to furious really quick.
"You don't get it don't you? And I thought you of all people knew me well." I hung up and lashed out my anger on the pillows and the comforter.
About 30 minutes later, I heard a car pull up at our driveway. I already knew it was James, so I headed downstairs, out of the house and into the streets to meet him. He motioned for me to get in the car, and I did.
As soon as got seated, I noticed that he was wearing a plain white shirt and grey chino shorts. "Oh, ganyan ka na ba pumarty?"
He rolled the windows down and turned off the engine before giving me an answer. "I'm not going anymore."
I rolled my eyes and looked out. "Okay. Then why are you here?"
"I just want to ask about the thing that I don't get. Because I don't really get it. Have I missed something?" He squinted at me while he talked, which made me uncomfortable and annoyed. "If I remember correctly, you were pissed when I said I'll be your wingman."
I just swallowed the lump in my throat and avoided his gaze.
"You don't like it?" I still didn't reply. Of course, idiot. "But why?"
Uh, because. "I just don't like it." I managed to whisper.
He disappointedly slammed his hand against the steering wheel. "Oh come on. Are we keeping secrets now? Help me out. You've already told me about your exes and you know, other stuff and you won't tell me about this-"
I slowly turned my head to the left and said, "Ikaw ba, kapag pinaghirapan at tinrabaho mo, kaya mong ipamigay na lang sa iba?" I said it in Tagalog, and I did it on purpose. If I wanted to drop hints, I still want it to be buried in another layer of a language that is not his native tongue.
He froze after I cut him off. We held each other's gaze for a good minute until he finally uttered, "After all those band-aides I gave you..."
Oh, so he got the message. I nodded slowly and with hesitation. I reached for the door, but before I could open it, he grabbed my arm and handed me something. "Oh, what's this? Ha?! Pineapple juice?"
"Chaser. Inom tayo?" I almost hit him with the can, and he giggled. "Peace offering."
I stitched my eyebrows together. "Labo mo."
"I'm sorry. Please don't be mad anymore." I didn't know sincerity can be measured using my ears, but I swore I heard it. "That's my peace offering. No band-aides for now. Pineapple juice for your heart."
"I still don't get it." I glared at the can I was holding, looking at it like it was a strange object I have never seen before.
"You're mad. Go easy on the butter, maha-high blood ka niyan." His face split into a grin and I ended up hitting him with my free hand. His smile turned into laughter, and I went crazy with the slaps, he had to shield himself with his arms.
"Galit ka na naman." He struggled as I was still attacking him. "Puso mo!"
In the end, we were both breathless from laughing at his corny pineapple juice joke. "Last mo na 'to ah."
"Never." He shook his head, but he was smiling. "Bati na tayo eh. So it's effective."
We said our goodbyes, and until the end, even when I was already standing outside, he was still repeatedly saying, "Puso mo."
"Stop saying that, annoying na."
"I won't shut up about it."
I rolled my eyes and waved at him. "Bye."
"Puso mo!"
And so instead of getting annoyed, I decided to go along with it. "Saan?"
"Nasa akin." He flashed a wide smile, then drove off.
Damn it. In the end, my plan with using Tagalog backfired.
- cheesy chap i knooooow bwahahahaha no regrets
i wuv u guys!!!! remind me to finish this tomorrow so i can finally focus on TATGHDLB!!!!!
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TOMORROW OKIE, MAG PROMISE AKO PARA MAPRESSURE AKO HAHAHAHA
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