OneShot, TwoShot, Three-Sword-Style

Shouldnt have Smiled

Zoro glanced over the only apparently sane Marine here, Vice Admiral Random, who was just as confused as he was.
"Uh...just...because."

"WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

"I didn't do sht!"

All the marines turned their head to the Vice Admiral, including the Captain. After all, he had the most experience with dealing with pirates like him, right? So seeing him calm helped them cool down a bit as well. Oodles glared at Zoro.
"You try something like that and we'll be forced to throw you overboard with nothing but chains secured to the ship, you hear me?"

"But I didn't DO anything!"

"YOU SMILED!" Ichibaka pointed accusingly. Zoro gave up.

"Fine." He sighed. "You got me, I smiled. Lock me up and throw away the--oh, wait."

The humor was lost upon the marines sans the Vice Admiral but he was mostly ignored. The others left him leaving two new guards, a bulk of a man who seemed no smarter than Luffy, or even less (the latter most likely), and a less bulky marine with glasses who sat down to read a book. Both have been silent throughout the entire ordeal.

The two new marines, both dubbed by Zoro as idiot and asshole respectively, sat down and made themselves comfortable.

"Honestly," AS scoffed, an air of smugness and superiority around him as he glanced up at the swordsman. "Getting worked over a smile. Some marine soldiers they were."

Zoro sighed in relief. At least this marine wouldn't go crazy at every little thing he did. Three minutes passed peacefully, until...something was itching his throat. Zoro didn't believe in God(s), but he knew he shouldn't tempt whatever deity was watching over him at the moment if they existed, so he tried to fight it. But the feeling was now irritating him like the witch or the cook on a bad day, and before his could reign it back in...

*ahem.*

*ah-ahem*

AS gripped his book a little tighter, unnoticed by Zoro, who focused on clearing his throat. The smug marine shook his head. Those were seastone-infused titanium bars and chains. There was no way to escape.

*ah-eeeemmm*

This man was just human, no Devil Fruit, no nothing. He was even without his swords, and he was blinded in one eye!

*ahem*

...A normal person who had probably spilled more blood than any of his crew mates even before joining and was rumored to be second in command? Said crew was known to be unpredictable...

*ah-ah-aheeeem*

His eyes narrowed...nobody should have to clear their throat that many times.

Zoro clears his throat one more time and finally feels his throat clear. Now maybe he could goad one of the marines here I to getting him a glass of water.

"What do you think you're doing?" Asshole asks him cooly.

The swordsman arched a brow. "Doing...?"

"WHAT YOU DID JUST NOW"

'For the love of--' "...I was clearing my throat."

"AHA!" Zoro admittedly jumped when the marine slammed his book on the floor, standing up. "SO YOU ADMITTED IT!" Zoro could only stare. "IT WAS A SIGNAL WASNT IT?"

"..." 'The hell is he taking abou-oh.' "No."

@$$hole nodded curtly, accepting the answer, and Zoro let out a sigh until the Marine shot up again.